RainyDayRoses

Told someone today that they hurt my feelings. They're my friend and I told them because I wanted to work through it and fix it and they basically said "fuck you, I did nothing wrong, you have no right to be mad, have a good life."
So there's that.

Some days at work are so slow that I feel like I'm being paid to sit in a cage and do nothing all day. I want to work on cosplay stuff. I'm just gnawing at the bars like:

Cosplay of Tamaki Amajiki, aka Suneater, from My Hero Academia, crouched on the ground, covering their mouth and smiling

Happy birthday, Suneater!! Feat. one of my favorite pictures ever

My coworker just asked me if I was straight.
I responded with, "no? I'm very queer."
And he says, "....I meant are you okay."

OOPS.

People have been drinking their dumb bitch juice this week, I stg. No one is using their brain. This is why they have critical thinking questions on tests.

Saw a post the other day that said, "I'm hyper independent because my parents were forgetting to pick me up from school in kindergarten and that taught me I can't rely on anyone." And I was SHOOK, because same. I knew it was parental issues, but I guess I didn't realize how early that shit started.

I can't stop thinking about that little boy in his little blue bunny hat and his too-big Spiderman backpack.

My boss is out of the office this week and I have no work to do. I feel like a Regency lady like, "With all this free time, I suppose I could catch up on my correspondence."

And by correspondence, I mean my Instagram messages.

Dating as a cosplayer can be tough because they'll be like, "just come over after your photoshoot!" Meanwhile, I'm sitting here like:

"Oh, you're cosplaying from Attack on Titan? Who is it? Mikasa? Hange? Historia? NO. IT'S THE TWINK FUCK."

At least I'm consistent.

"They could make a video game with you as an actual character. Just a 1 to 1 version of you in the sickest outfit. Perfect for cosplay. And you would still say, 'that's cool. I'm gonna cosplay the twink character instead.'"

Correct.

I don't want to be fabulously wealthy. I don't need a huge house or fancy cars. I just want to have enough money to not be filled with anxiety over checking my bank account.

"The bitch that shits in me sees, honors, recognizes, and respects the bitch that shits in you."

A small, pencil drawing of a cat wearing an oversized button up and tie, labeled A. Charr

This mf just brought me this 😂
"Please submit all complaints to A. Charr."

I work in a small office with my best friend, Tommy. He just walked over to my desk and this conversation ensued:

T: "Hey, which of these slang terms for cvm is the grossest to you as an asexual?"

Me: "We need an HR department."

Oops, I accidentally let someone see the vulnerable, unhealed, messy side of me and now I want to disintegrate into the abyss.

15 years ago, when I was 16, the local strip club, known for the large breasted women that worked there, shut down. My mother remarked how sad it was that my career was over before it even started. Everyone always knew I would turn out this way.

a woman in a red and white sweater is sitting at a table . ALT: a woman in a red and white sweater is sitting at a table .

I am having disproportionate emotional responses to things today.

Plz send money for therapy. Or a gym membership. If I can't make peace with my demons, I'd at least like to be able to outrun them.

"Here's your tree, little lady! Do you have someone to help you get it inside?"
No. It's just me. But that's okay. I do it alone every year.
"Well. That makes me very sad."

Me, too, Christmas Tree Man. Me, too.

(SPOILER ALERT: I'M ASEXUAL. THAT'S THE JOKE. BEFORE ANYONE SAYS SOME DUMB SHIT)

"What if we went to play mini golf and laser tag and then we get food and binge the first half of the new My Hero Academia season? And what if we did all of that in My Hero cosplays?"

Is this.... sexual attraction?

Sometimes I really hate that I care as much as I do. I remember everything. I ask how people's doctor's appointments went and if they ever got their car fixed and how's your wife doing, I know she just had surgery. And no one ever asks about me or remembers the things I say. It just feels lonely.

I love ordering things late at night when I'm half asleep because I completely forget that I did it and then when it comes in the mail it's like a little surprise present from me to me.

Star just asked me "has anyone ever told you that you give off Charlie Brown energy?" And I think it's the meanest thing anyone has ever said to me 😂

My kink is when someone listens to what I have to say and remembers it later. I have yet to find someone who matches my freak.

"At one point, I was sleep deprived, cold, dehydrated, and hadn't eaten in over 12 hours and I thought. This is how Rainy feels all the time."
Correct.

Oh, I'm actually asexual.
"Please forgive me, I'm not super educated in this area. What does asexual mean?"
"It means they're attracted to everyone!!"
Woahh, hold on.
"Yeah, like. You have no preference. So everyone!"
BRO WHAT. NO. Can you let me explain my own sexuality? He asked so politely, too.

Yo, Yelena Belova was onto something fr. I just put hot sauce on my mac n cheese for the first time and my life is changed. This shit slaps.

I just referred to Hyunjin as my bias. Someone come take my phone from me before I enter my SKZ era.