rufus

cleaning my vacuum cleaner, thereby becoming a vacuum cleaner. in this essay i

is daylight ever gonna learn to save itself or is it just gonna continue to be a damsel in distress every year?

Have the kind of sex where you have to buy a new house.

Happy Birthday 🤗🎉

You can treat my face like a Jackson Pollock if you wanna

international women’s day 2: electric boogaloo

yeah

never underestimate a good drum beat enhancing overall mood

A right handed pipe that has a yelliw shaft. Three blue knobs for your left hand to grip and a very colorful bowl

ok so Tanya is my bong
Pennifer is my vape pen
i need a name for this pipe

Add one word to a film to ruin it.

Schindler’s Grocery List

Add one word to a film to ruin it.

There's Something Fishy About Mary

YouTube video by Brett Novak Andy Anderson: The Shape of Paris

ok. this video just took me out. i lost count of how many i exclaimed "what?"
@auberon.bsky.social
you might dig this 😎

I'm an acquired taste.

And don't care if anyone acquires the taste.

Sign on white paper, stuck on a vending machine: "OUT OF ORDER Removing this sign will not make it work"

Monday Mood

can’t spell “approachable” without “roach”

It feels good to be home. even if it's cold af and i wanna go back to cali

I asked God why he hates me and he answered: “you’re too powerful, my child,” he said to me

🤗✌🏾

these dang robots took are jawbs!
also, who farted?

I make adjusting to daylight savings easy by getting absolutely shitfaced.

Teaching my cat to do the god damn dishes

The sixth hole at Cameron Park CC i made bogey 🤪

sorry, i'm busy

yes!

Rufus @te-kanawa.bsky.social at his happiest!

*plays the drum solo from in the air tonight perfectly*

I rest my case your honor

Ooh. I wanna try that one

odin, a brown shar pei / lab mix, sitting on a green lawn in a backyard with the morning sun glowing off his glorious rolls. his eyes are closed giving an annoyed look, probably from the sun but also because he’s annoyed at having to sit there for a photo shoot

when you realize you lost an hour and didn’t actually sleep in a little bit

Elder
so good

More daylight, darker sunglasses.

A yellow excavator next to a big pile of rubble in a street. There's only a small section that's not yet been demolished, and this includes a large Hardee's advertising sign with a smaller messageboard below it that reads: "CLOSED"

Oh, no! It's closed!