Kat

What if: a body that didn’t ow

dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early astronaut: moon's haunted nasa employee: what? astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon's haunted 10:18 PM - 29 Oct 2018

I got bad news about the moon bro

Apparently this is a known issue with Frigidaire ovens??????? But no there have literally been no sudden temperature changes or impacts to the door that would reasonably lead to the glass EXPLODING

NO

I WAS JUST STANDING NEXT TO IT WAITING FOR IT TO FINISH PREHEATING AND IT FUCKING EXPLODED

Then: you’re all full of shit lol

Now: you’re all full of shit AND I have assorted lettuces

I….

Foucault sighting, take a drink

To do: read article club homework, run to library, knitting group, article club

I believe in your small plastic-toothed daughter

Doll photos not enough, I need to bite a politician

It’s the little things that keep me going

Hello from 10mg gummy and ancient aliens drinking game

Awooooo

can I hear a little commotion for cuppy tea

no, this is my load-bearing repetitive strain injury

Yeah you have to be an established customer with an ongoing relationship with your personal sales rep and MAYBE they will offer you a birkin and you don’t get any option about it and also if you DON’T buy it when offered bc it’s not to your taste you will never be offered another one again lolsob

And that you can’t even buy unless you get a good grade in customer!!!!

13. How the fuck does an oven window shatter during preheat without anything touching it, my dude you had one (1) job

9. How tf am I supposed to live laugh make quesadillas without an oven
10. There are still pieces of shattered glass in the nooks and crannies of the oven door
11. My poor vacuum
12. The viral chicken cobbler recipe is very good

5. This may not be a “new oven” situation and may, in fact, only be a “new glass” situation
6. I know shockingly little about windows
7. Tempered glass is great until it fucking isn’t
8. My specific oven window had enough glass to fill a Costco gf pizza 3-pack box (once shattered)

1. Coleslaw is fine
2. I am fine (got one (1) tiny piece of glass embedded in my palm but it is already out and only bled a little)
3. Oven door is not fine
4. I don’t know what part the glass front plays in the overall function of the oven so I don’t really want to use it or the stove right now???

HOLY SHIT INDEED

A 9x13 glass pan with a chicken cobbler in it. It is swimming in gravy and has beautiful golden brown spots on the biscuit topping.

Anyway thank you door number 4 for letting me cook my fully assembled chicken cobbler and not have to throw the whole thing away inshallah my property manager gets me a new oven soon bc how tf am I supposed to cook anything like this

So then I had to call the emergency maintenance line AND THEN knock on a bunch of my neighbors’ doors to find someone that was a) home, and b) willing to let me use their oven for an hour

A stainless steel oven. The glass of the outer window has shattered and is on the floor.

Started my evening my turning my oven on to make chicken cobbler and THE DOOR FUCKING EXPLODED

There are no rules!! Free yourself from the dictatorship of linear time!!!!

(famous last words before tripping onto the quest path)

1. Suffer
2. Goodthink
3. Profit????

Went to post office to mail sister birthday present, then went [back] to used bookstore and acquired cookbook (x2), Great War book, and polar exploration books