Senior staff,
I am still looking for my bat’leth. Inform me if you find it.
Worf
Senior staff,
I am still looking for my bat’leth. Inform me if you find it.
Worf
holodeck games where you punch nazis
17.02.2026 17:58 — 👍 1014 🔁 198 💬 20 📌 7
Engineering,
My calisthenics program has a problem. Instead of proper opponents the holodeck is only creating cartoon ponies.
Worf
Captain,
Dr. Crusher has ordered me to inform you that I am too sick to work today. I have now completed the task she has assigned me. I will be at my post as usual.
Worf
All crew,
Fire suppression on decks 9 to 21 will be tested at 1130 hours. There will be a harmless white gas. Hold your breath.
Worf
Amazon seller,
The bat'leth you sent me is faulty. It broke right away in combat. I insist you accept returns in this instance.
Worf
Commander,
I believe I have just solved a string of 20th century Earth crimes. Are you familiar with the Zodiac Killer?
Worf
Glorifax Customer Service,
My honor rating in your system is much lower than in the other two honor reporting agencies. Obviously there has been an error. I demand a correction.
Worf, son of Mogh
Security personnel,
Some Cardassians are coming aboard. The Captain insists we treat them as guests.
Keep your eyes on our guests.
Worf
Guinan,
What do you have in Ten Forward for a hangover?
Worf
Dr. Pulaski,
My name is spelled Worf, not Wharf. Do not make this mistake again.
Worf
Geordi,
Is there a way to enter our authorization codes by typing them instead of speaking aloud to the computer? Several crew members have complained that they need to memorize a new code after each use because coworkers overheard them.
Worf
Self reminder. Sharpen bat'leth.
06.02.2026 17:22 — 👍 79 🔁 15 💬 2 📌 0
Commander Data,
Your speed and strength are impressive. Would you consider sparring with me tomorrow?
Worf
Commander Riker,
I regret I must cancel our game today, as you seem unwell. Beating a sick man would be dishonorable.
Worf
Security personnel,
Do not put phasers in the lost and found. We have weapon procurement procedures for a reason.
Worf
Guinan,
I have been meaning to ask you, how do your claws repel Q? And can you teach others to do that?
Worf
Data,
I am done feeding your animal. Come collect it.
Worf
Security personnel,
I have imbibed an Earth weed and it is having an effect. I need to know who is conspiring against me. Report.
Worf
Remove me from this list
19.01.2026 16:49 — 👍 119 🔁 17 💬 2 📌 2
Captain,
There is a strong possibility the Dominion may have hacked our email system. We must change all access codes today.
Worf
Mother,
I am well. The captain continues to dismiss my suggestions. It is not easy being the only Klingon. I do enjoy poker nights.
Worf
UNSUBSCRIBE
09.01.2026 20:22 — 👍 130 🔁 19 💬 6 📌 1
Commander,
Thank you for the LinkedIn recommendation. Should I write one for you as well?
Worf
Commander,
During your mission we rescued an escape pod containing a gold humanoid and a beeping trash can. They are with Data.
Worf
Deanna,
I noticed you were looking at me today. Is your wish to engage in combat or would you like to have dinner?
Worf
No.
Worf
Chief O'Brien,
I wish to apologize for my behavior at the Feats of Strength competition. It was not my intention to injure you.
Worf
Security personnel,
The captain is behaving strangely. If he gives you a direct order, run it by me first.
Worf
Captain,
When we visit planets 4 and 8 of the Chan system, is the Prime Directive still in effect? They deserve some interference.
Worf