Jason Malstrom

It's always fun to watch hockey players pretending they are still playing hockey after they have dropped their stick.

Some Millennials just changed the music from The Doors to Collective Soul and I've never hated Millennials more than right now.

Biathlon sort of makes me wish the Skeet Surfing was a real thing.

This was the first Anglican church I visited since I was 4, and it really opened me up to the possibility of church. It was a beautiful service in a beautiful space.

Apparently the President managed to run the Kennedy center like one of his casinos, straight into the ground and closed.

If Amazon is interested, I'll gladly sell them the option to the story of my life for 5 million dollars. It will likely be a bigger draw than that other one they optioned for 28 million.

Hot take: If you spell words replacing an R with an H, like "chowdah" then you're not a real Bostonian because a real Bostonian doesn't hear the difference between the two.

Pro tip, if your kid is crying about being at the brewery, the rest of us aren't too happy about it either.

Plus donating money for a ballroom

If someone hugs a flag to show you they are patriotic, they probably are not.

To Kristi Noem, we are all potential dogs to be shot.

I'm watching the bartender trying to find a show to put up on the bar's TV and my thought is, "and people said that watching TV wasn't a valuable career skill"

Do you know what is even better than screaming babies at the bar? Someone facetiming screaming babies into the bar.

Meanwhile at FIFA ...

I know this is a joke, but I disagree. I used to reliably get two packs of oyster crackers with my chowder, and now it's always only one.

Since I'm planning on flying internationally tomorrow, let me just say that the President is a brilliant man with lots of well thought-out, practical, ideas. He is insuring the financial security of this country for years to come, and his personal hygiene is above reproach.

I've experienced poor travel times due to weather, aircraft malfunction, missing pilots, tired cabin crews, but this is the first time I've been concerned about Government funding.

To be honest, I thought the President wouldn't try to starve people till after the mid terms.

This year is my lamest Halloween costume, I just wore the same clothes from yesterday and went as me from yesterday.

Nothing has given more popularity to socialism than conservatives trying to slander middle of the road social liberal programs as socialism.

Old movies are so weird
Director: I want to film a monster movie
Studio: Great, make sure it has a rousing dance number
Director: But this is a monster movie ...
Studio: Look, I don't care what kind of movie you are making, but a movie isn't a movie without a rousing dance number!

Replacing a multi function building that can be used almost every day with a building that can be used 0 to 4 times a year, just shows a completely lack of aptitude towards resource management.

It feels like the wrong half of the Government is currently shutdown

I'm finding myself having to donate more money to help offset the ruling party's incompetence. Is this the winning we were told we would be tired of?

They are sickly sweet, and I'm from Boston where we cook them in molasses

"I have the immune system of a small Victorian boy" - Gen Z coworker

In my parents RV resort, many Canadians sold off their lots.

We haven't seen this much destruction of the White House building since the war of 1812

It's interesting to see that the President is confirming he is literally sh*tting on the American people.

Trump plays, the rest of us pay....