Lu

I will consult my sister she had a very good method for this and her plants arrived safely in her new place ☺️

I’ve text him. Poor man might be slow to reply as he’s very jet lagged but I’ll let you know what he says 😘

Be sluttier

You know what really annoys me? Some people in this world don't need glasses to be able to see. Do you know how damn lucky you are? Fuck you

I can consult Dan on this if you like! What are you trying to play?

I’ve listened to Hilary Duff the entire journey back to mum’s. Needles to say I think I like her new song!

The delivery is done. The stock room is tidy and recruitment is finally up to date. Here’s hoping some of the interviews I have on tomorrow are successful 🤞

Why yes I did do three hours overtime tonight to prove a point when my boss returns from annual leave.

The level of stubborn I become purely to prove a point is actually quite impressive.

Managed to find some music to distract little man from the fireworks

Using this very rainy day to declutter the flat and I’m finding all sorts of funny things

Sorted out my hair 💇🏻‍♀️

They put a disappearing post feature on threads. Is it available to me? No no it is not.

You mean to tell me I’ve been putting off changing my GP as I was panicking about a shared care agreement issue.

And my psychiatrist is like no Lucy they just transfer it across.

Guess it’s just my autism fearing changing doctors after 12 years of the same doctor then 😅

My gran starts treatment soon and the whole family is feeling on edge.

Work has been quite stressful.

And the pre birthday dread is starting to set in as it does every year.

I have been stuck in wait mode today due to a number of things with time constraints. Anxiety is through the roof and I have pretty much no energy to blunder through what I have to do this evening.

If anyone is wondering how I am just know that today I had a meltdown because Dan was making avocado on toast too loudly.

I feel like that rather neatly sums up my current mental state: overwhelmed by pretty much anything

My former twitter personality is alive and well over on threads.

But annoyingly all my people from Twitter seem to have migrated here instead.

Woooo Jason is home. You must be so chuffed.

My time will come but until then I’m just enjoying being happy and disgustingly in love.

Pressing pause on this next step has made me realise how sure I am of him. That I have found my person. Which ultimately is more important than any single day. For that I am very grateful.

That and how wonderful to not currently be in Bridezilla mode.

So instead of being sad over it, I am gonna remind myself I am incredibly lucky. To have an amazing partner who has weathered so many storms with me in the seven years we have been together. To know I still have all the excitement of marrying him to look forward to.

I just keep reminding myself I am so grateful that our relationship is really solid again. That we did the brave and scary thing even if it meant delaying a very important day.

We both come from broken homes so it was so important for us to be right when we did get married.

I’m sad. I still cry a lot over it. I will probably be a mess on Monday. But I also know with my gran’s health being bad and work stress. It would’ve been a terrible time to have wedding stress thrown into the mix.

There’s at least 12 reasons I’m glad we cancelled as it was the right call for us. But I am still devastated because I’m still so excited to get to become Dan’s wife.

Cancelling your wedding but staying with your partner is such a specific kind of grief.

I was gonna be a wife on Monday and instead I will probably just be drunk and sad on a beach.

I’ve been singing the songs all week. Poor Dan 😂

hard to swallow pills your friends do love you your brain is just mean

Spot on. Me and this potato could be twins.

What a mood!