Scotty Porter

Brutalised Buttplug

I saw this delightful Christmas drinks dispenser earlier and now I can't get the word 'smeggnog' out of my head

PLEASE HAVE YOUR NUTS WEIGHED AT REGISTER DURING CHECKOUT

Well, if you insist...

I'VE SEEN YOUR SEARCH HISTORY YOU'RE GETTING LUBE FOR CHRISTMAS.

What's the best response to "you're weird"? You talk a lot shit for a dude in cumshot distance. What the fuck

I’m covered in soap kneeling at the edge of the jacuzzi gripping my ass tighter than a nuns coochie 😏😏😏

When I said I want to “get a room” this is what I meant.. 🥴🍑

Him: I'm a top Me: prove it

Eat cheese and sin

The same thing I do every night.....

HEY, WE PAID YOU A MILLION DOLLARS TO SHAVE WITH OUR RAZOR! WHY DO YOU STILL HAVE A BEARD? You DIDN'T SAY IT HAD TO BE MY FACE

Tweet stating: Buying girls OnlyFans vs watching pornhub is the equivalent to supporting small businesses vs big corporations. Look at your friends butthole instead of a strangers this holiday season

Shop local 😈

THE TWO TYPES OF PEOPLE WHEN THEY HEAR I'M QUEER, POLYAMOROUS, AND KINKY

SEND US A PIC OF YOUR JUNK & GET A FREE ESTIMATE EWWWWW....

Wanna put your face in it?

On my Stream ⛓️😈 next week !

💦𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗠𝗶𝘀𝘀 𝗜𝘁! #JockBreeders
Ty Thomas barebacks Cash Lockhart
rebrand.ly/m1x24fg

Yes. Any cheese will do. You need twice as much as you think.

✨Chris Keaton & Tyler Tanner
🎞️Coming out December 11
rebrand.ly/0db8v1f
#JockBreeders

Picture of a bank statement with a Costa spend highlighted, but with multiple large OnlyFans charges on it also

Jeez, the cost of living crisis is real! Checking my spending today, and notice it was £7.47 for a medium cappuccino and a piece of shortbread! 😬

Where's the lie???

Out Now: ICE & SWEET 🎄

Falling for my crush at my ex’s Christmas wedding? Piece of cake!

📖 Available on Kindle, KU & in Paperback
Find it here: mybook.to/iceandsweet

Join Luke and André as their longterm crush comes to a head at their best friend's wedding in this sparkling holiday romance!

Romeo Twink

I'm gonna need to put up a flood warning for this video 😳💦. The way @britboysxxx.bsky.social drenched literally everything in the room 🥵😍. Please give their account lots of love 😏😘. One of the biggest loads yet 😈! He's got such a cute face doesn't he?

See you at ⋆˙⟡⊹˖shiMMer˖⊹⟡˙⋆!

Did anyone say BLACK FRIDAY?
Freebies? Want them?
One Christmassy-Fluff-antidote story of grief and finding that missing piece of your heart. Mybook.to/SecondWinter
And the wackiest farce you've ever read. Mybook.to/NakedCleaner
Free on Amazon UK and Amazon US this weekend only.

Quote this with who you'd be in Star Trek
(Mine was obvious 🤣)