Alexa

😒

i do remember texting you being like “who are these people????? where are my friends????” because the transition into summer house was deeply confusing to me

the backdoor pilot aka when kyle tells stassi she looks like steve jobs????

different platform, same hater mentality!!!

🙄

what if i could consume any media normally and not have it completely recalibrate my brain likeeeee what iiiiifffffff omg that would be the coolest!!!!!

a large french vanilla iced coffee from dunkin donuts tastes like a 10 hour day in the little theatre circa 2012.

i think both my blessing and my curse in this life is that i give off snow white vibes to animals. i find an animal in distress at least once a month!!!! i have places to be and then suddenly i’m engaged in a rescue mission for a rogue puppy on the side of the road!!! i’m sweatin!!!!

ugh same

THE BEST LAID PLANS OF MICE AND MEN OFTEN GO AWRY.

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

the bug has still not revealed itself and i just completed a thorough search. what are the odds he simply found a way to vacate the premises?

like sure, we didn’t need a pinkberry on every corner, but i’d still like to dabble on occasion!!!!

the cupcake and froyo craze of the early 2010s is a true example of the lord giveth (to excess) and the lord taketh away (entirely).

but in all seriousness, i had become kind of desensitized to bugs when i lived in new york, but i have not experienced a bug of this magnitude in my four years of living in philly. i had a full mental breakdown during which i turned to my cat and asked, very earnestly, “why is this happening to me?”

there is a large bug somewhere in my living room. i sprayed him with windex but he scurried away. try as i might, i could not find him. i’m now in my bedroom, towels blocking the crack under my door, praying that he is slowly dying from his windex bath. but alas…he will persevere. as all enemies do.

pour one out for the pope!!!!

my allergies are so bad this year that my eyes have been perpetually red for weeks. feelin vampy!!!!!

first up, inconsequential: the spring bouquets at the farmer’s market today were really lacking which was very disappointing. it’s spring!!!! where are the show-stopping blooms?!!!!

i think i might just use bluesky the way i originally used twitter which was basically as a diary. laid out both the most inconsequential details and the most batshit experiences of my life for the world to see. so… welcome back, 2009.

a woman is sitting in a pink chair with her hands folded in prayer . ALT: a woman is sitting in a pink chair with her hands folded in prayer .

You know what’s underrated? Just going full caveman on a rotisserie chicken, hot or cold.

Give it up for rotisserie chicken!

SUNNY DAY SWEEPIN THE CLOUDS AWAY