ultra strawberry dreams 🍓

it's straightforward to punch one nazi but when everyone around you casually engages in nazi activities this definitely merits an alternative strategy

yeah i guess if there are any classical music-related jobs anyone can think of i’m willing to do them

apparently life would be good if i didn’t have to love someone and instead would marry someone and have a family i don’t care that much about just for stability and to obey the patriarchal diktat. somehow my number of husbands and children continues to be 0

every day i tell myself the only way to have a good life is to give up on self-actualization and personal happiness and willingly submit to a hierarchical power structure rooted in tradition. then i don’t submit to a hierarchical power structure rooted in tradition

Lynnesbian @lynnesbian@fedi.lynnesbian.space You're doubting my humanity, but you're missing some key points. Here are some of the things I've seen: Attack ships firing off the shoulder of Orion. These aren't just battleships — they're spacecraft designed for warfare. C-beams glittering in the dark. Their location? Near the Tannhäuser Gate. Things you wouldn't believe. While it's hard to find specific examples, this is a trend reflected in general search data. The bottom line: All those moments will be lost — like tears in rain.

they still act like they’re trying to bargain with us, like they have no control of anything important to them; like their control of the government and the media and the economy tastes like ashes in their mouth as long as any trans person is happy

what’s weird to me is how unsatisfied the transphobes are. on X i once talked to someone who was like “yes. we hate your tiny minority group so much we’re willing to destroy the country just to not see you. doesn’t that make you want to detransition?” and obvs i was like “no why would it”

genuinely have barely written any music, any new works that aren’t just revisions or revivals of old ideas i had, in more than half a decade. if i finish this it will be my ~American Symphony~ or w/e just bc it’s the first idea ive actually had living in america

im writing a large orchestral piece consisting mostly of quotations because i guess its 2026 or something

oh yeah i also will try to post more on instagram and threads (username: avalentineoutofseason) if anyone wants to follow me there

existing etudes are too hard for me and existing preparatory studies are too boring, so i guess now i'm putting some together for myself for whenever the piano is tuned again

(idea stolen from Marc-André Hamelin / Paganini etudes var. 7, the only one i could ever be able to play lol)

weird, first 2 weeks it always makes me incredibly sleepy and lethargic and then things pick up again (unfortunately also increased incidence of migraines, but those didn’t go away when i stopped it so i guess i just only have 4 or 5 days in a week now)

we should not be peaceful in the face of a genocide. israel should be stopped militarily. it should be dismantled by force, and there should be war crimes tribunals. i couldn't care less about being "peaceful."

maybe i should lean into it and work night shifts? but i genuinely hate being awake at night, i only do it bc i need to finish work on time and couldn’t make myself do so during the day

apparently people are normally able to focus their mind and lock into tiresome drudgery and mindless labor at like 8am, instead of not feeling awake enough to do so until about 10pm when the impending need for sleep forces them to do it

like maybe the next rain of frogs should happen in Russia or Brazil or something. give the middle east a break

kinda sick of this always happening, when are we going to get some biblical plagues that *aren’t* zionist

it’s a small percentage to be sure but they have all the capital and capital is the only thing that matters these days

unfortunately i also know trans ppl whose families went from passively nonaccepting but putting up with them (or e.g. not trying to insist others use their birth name etc) to outright cutting them off or becoming abusive, mostly since november 2024. also have met a lot of newly anti-trans people

so when are we going to start burning down the data centers

as has been the explicit policy in most of the world post-2020

for example “trans people produce more surplus value for capital when having access to medication/surgery/etc” doesn’t make sense when the # of hospital beds, doctors, nurses etc is being cut to the minimum necessary to restrict medical care to the ruling class, leaving everyone else to die

i mean there’s no viable counterarguments to these positions; if the government was like “we’re banning trans people next week” there is no basis to convince them otherwise that makes sense within their value system. i guess we are an aberration to that system and have to operate outside it somehow

being a lifelong medical patient yields the standard extortion threat: “you are too weak to survive without modern technology and depend on society to produce medication for you: therefore you only exist on the sufferance of the transphobic ruling class and must appease them by any means”

we know from looking at the european continent that societies where women have social and not just legal equality that birth rates recover, often to a greater degree than captured in stats (which are significantly underestimated because childbearing is increasingly delayed)

i don’t understand economics at all and maybe free market capitalism can just keep doing this for 100 years without negative consequences for the bankers. but it seems unlikely

it seems like uber eats now has to borrow $60 from you and promise to pay it back next week when the bank actually gets your money to them, the bank has to steal an extra $40 from you when you overdraft because they don’t trust the government to keep them solvent and have to depend on you instead

am i wrong in thinking that the way every company is now putting holds on your card and no one’s bank is processing deposits on time sort of indicates a total loss of confidence by the bankers in the governments that maintain the international monetary system

or we could just make those accommodations available to everyone, and ensure they’re part of how society works by default. that seems both simpler and more ethical

sex can be changed pretty easily actually. it may not count as “enough” of a change for you, but it’s usually enough to allow trans people to be identified socially as the opposite sex and lead normal lives