An giraffe

ME: wow it gets dark so early now

MY UBER PASSENGER: please open your eyes

In the grand tradition of .rec 3 and Blair witch 2 they have abandoned the found footage entirely

Still need more baseball?

We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.

Folks: this is not a drill. A new hell house llc has dropped I repeat we are on hell house llc 5

arknights (2019):

I’m glad that the vinegar syndrome release of mac and me has the Japanese ending where the cops shoot a child but I dunno if I want to own mac and me just to show people that it exists

Keep us updated

I’m too fat and trans to fly but I ALSO just want to increase the amount of misery in the world

A comic strip titled The Amazing World of Tomorrow. A food delivery robot cooler drives down a sidewalk. It crashes into a rental scooter. It backs up. It crashes into the rental scooter again. The scooter wobbles. The scooter falls to the ground as the food delivery robot backs up again. A driverless taxi crashes into both the scooter and the food delivery robot sending them flying.

The Amazing World Of Tomorrow

Seriously let’s go let’s play chicken with the economy who gives a shit anymore

I definitely wouldn't have thought this yesterday but as of right now I'm pretty sure I could beat the shit out of everyone at the Bass Pro Shop in Odessa Texas by myself

here’s how the rest of the #Eeveelutions react to bathtime… 🛁🫧✨

Invention idea:

Ice cubes that automatically roll under the refrigerator when dropped.

a void girl with big white teeth in a witchy outfit

One can keep the spirit of Halloween in your heart, all year long

It’s fun to go back to the book and pennywise just turns into, like, a mummy. Having 40 years of horror freaks sitting around brainstorming meaner situations is paying dividends.

Time to move to Mexico City for 18 months you will be fluent in no time

I’ve never watched or listened to a second of Hamilton but as someone who likes hazbin hotel and helluva boss I know what it is like to enjoy a deeply stupid and embarrassing musical that is bizarrely popular

If SNAP could only be used to buy gray nutrition sludge that had the same taste and consistency as shredded wet newspaper you would have people upset that people were buying sludge flavor packets

mavis beacon, arms crossed, wearing piccolo's cape as she stands in front of a whiteboard.

seeing marge with piccolo's cape reminded me that last year i answered the big question plaguing my generation:

would mavis beacon in the piccolo fit go hard?

the answer: yes.

Man what a fucking shot from the first 2 minutes of the crazies

Question for horror fans do you like your monsters in a monster movie to be man made or alien

the blob in the blob 58 is an alien monster but the blob in the blob 88 is a man made monster

Ancient god? That’s an alien. Ancient god that is here because the army ripped a hole in reality? Man made

God damn chun li unclench you are going to pull something if you fight like that

This is why being into movies rules there is always some new thing to find

I’d never heard of Cinema da Boca do Lixo before I’ll have to see what I can actually watch because I can’t imagine much of it is available to me but people making weirdo transgressive films while under a military dictatorship sounds fascinating

Ah I seem to have stumbled into a Brazilian cultural thing I’ve never heard of

@cyberstalin.bsky.social why didn’t you tell me about Zé do Caixão he rules

This guy’s bead is too big for his face

I do admire that there has been at least 30 minutes of drunk people chanting “everyone get naked” while a pair of boobs bounce up and down intercut a bunch of mobsters playing poker

I have to believe that if you were filming a movie named “the strange hostel of naked pleasures” in 1976 Brazil you would have been able to find more attractive people than this

I’ve seen Brazilians! They should have tried harder