Drank a Celsius on an empty stomach earlier and omg…I felt like I was on whatever Slayyyter was singing about.
04.03.2026 19:43 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Drank a Celsius on an empty stomach earlier and omg…I felt like I was on whatever Slayyyter was singing about.
04.03.2026 19:43 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0The Big Arch from McDonald’s has piqued some interest….
04.03.2026 00:22 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Kim Petras filmed a music video in the park that I walk through every single day but i somehow didn't see her
03.03.2026 19:57 — 👍 11 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 1Bloomf and I spending all our time at the gym discussing new fast food menu items 🙂↕️
03.03.2026 22:26 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0Tostitos scoops bag advertises “no added MSG” … like okay I wasn’t expecting you to do that anyway? Whatever..
02.03.2026 02:58 — 👍 6 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
Sky Ferreira playing at Wawa
28.02.2026 13:53 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Yeah that’s great, anyway what’s the status of the Q1 report? Boss wants an update by EOD ☺️
26.02.2026 01:00 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0An air fryer is such a coworker appliance..
25.02.2026 23:38 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 1
Had to use find my iPhone to figure out which gym locker my stuff was in cuz I forgot
24.02.2026 18:02 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
a bumper sticker reading "KEEP HONKING! I'M YIELDING TO PEDESTRIANS AS I AM REQUIRED TO DO BY LAW"
a bumper sticker reading "KEEP HONKING! I'M CORRECTLY PERFORMING A ZIPPER MERGE"
a bumper sticker reading "KEEP HONKING I'M NOT SPEEDING IN A SCHOOL ZONE"
working on a Massachusetts collection
12.11.2024 13:47 — 👍 1147 🔁 187 💬 62 📌 26
If Emmymade has 1 million fans, I am one of them
If Emmymade has 5 fans, I am one of them
If Emmymade has 1 fan, that one is me
If Emmymade has no fans, I am no longer alive
If the world is against Emmymade, I am against the entire world
Good hockey trade will have you caged on the Zamboni…
31.01.2026 03:22 — 👍 16 🔁 5 💬 0 📌 0Especially in a parking garage…their days are numbered
30.01.2026 02:29 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Forgot to pack utensils and no time to go to cafeteria so I am eating my roasted turnip and rutabaga with a coffee stirrer at my desk
29.01.2026 17:08 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Had to look the waiter in the eye and tell him I wanted the “fuck me noodle bowl” … and tbh it tasted so good and was worth the embarrassment
17.01.2026 18:04 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Silver Linings Tradebook
10.01.2026 02:59 — 👍 8 🔁 2 💬 1 📌 0Like…let’s just press record and keep doing our job mamas
07.01.2026 01:18 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Runny nose, temperature probe in lab malfunctioned, AND my Clif bar got stuck in the vending machine…it’s okay I’m okay.
05.01.2026 18:15 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Do NOT listen to LUX at the gym…I got goosebumps in my short shorts on the hip abductor machine!!! 😭😭😭
30.12.2025 16:38 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
Just saw Meredith marks…I’m shaking.
13.12.2025 03:42 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
I’m so sick…
06.12.2025 04:23 — 👍 14 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0I literally wake up to the smell of egg like how normal ppl wake up to coffee…it’s normalized here
15.11.2025 23:06 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Meeeee w my Parmesan cheese hydroflask 😍😍😍
24.10.2025 00:02 — 👍 8 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0
The concept of the listicle as a literary form …
23.10.2025 23:19 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0standing in front of the fun house mirror at the gym that makes me look skinny, standing there for 20 min, and logging it as a workout on my Apple Watch
08.09.2025 17:51 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
