Spider Feathers

I hate to say comp sci majors live up to the stereotypes but my professor had to pull one guy out of class to tell him how badly he stunk

I got a callback! I knew it using eggman's pissing on the moon monologue was a good one for my auditions

At the eye doc on 9/11 so next time I can see those planes coming

On today's dashcam: a truck full of bread

Got told my hair gives me a "mysterious sexy air" by a guy with several bible verses and "GOD" tattooed on his head

Things I call my boyfriend when I want to see pure disgust and agony on his face:
- delicious darling
- moist monster
- sloppy stingray
- voluptuous vole
- wet willow
And more

I'm a real man I keep my makeup in a tackle box

I've done so much manual labor at work this past week getting campus floors ready to be waxed. Someone tell me I'm a strong and pretty boy

I saw that penalty. Go to the box

Yeah that about sums me up

poomang.com/en/t/mycore_...

This is the 3rd time I've woken up to an explosion somewhere outside my apartment. Can I NOT nap in peace???

Call your boyfriend sugartits. Be ungovernable

watching S3 of worst cooks in america. can't wait to see Anne beat Bobby Flay

A transmasc derby player that has not yet started hrt

"you broke a poor old woman's ribs! This is why men shouldn't be allowed in women's sports!" - my friend saying this to me, a transmasc roller derby player

Does the new Superman trailer look like ai to anyone else or is it just me?

Screenshot of a poster saying

‘Morning…Mourning 🌺💔💙🇺🇸🇺🇸💔

Aging like the love child of a fine wine and Paul Rudd

The image features the American flag in the background, with a prominent bald eagle, which is a national symbol of the United States, superimposed in the foreground. The text at the top reads "LAND OF THE FREE," and the text at the bottom reads "HOME OF THE WORLD'S LARGEST PRISON POPULATION." This juxtaposition of imagery and text seems to convey a critical commentary on the notion of freedom in the United States, highlighting the paradox of having a large prison population.

Saw a cyber truck on my street and gagged at the driver. I thought we were in a good neighborhood here 😭😭😭

A Lego mini figure with brown hair, askew glasses, and a ~ for a mouth. He's got a trans flag cat sweater on and is accompanied by a white fluffy cat. Homeboy is also covered in cat hair

I FOUND THAT MOTHERFUCKIN TWINK #lego #legotwink

Not my grandma with the relevant cat gifs

My dumbass cat curled up in the weirdest position with her back legs stretching past her head. She's halfway on her back and halfway on her side. Good god

How is she comfortable??? #cat

Illustration of a group of characters drawn in a cartoon, midcentury-style. They are at pride and the whole piece is a rainbow gradient with the characters in different colours. A sign held by the character at the top says “none of us are free until all of us are free”

None of us are free until *all* of us are free ✨

New tattoo alert! Blue jay with a jack knife

What's your definition of brutalism tho

Half a buds broiler cup of Malibu later and I think I've killed any mold I might've ingested

I think I girlbossed too close to the sun

There was apparently mold in the parmesan cheese I was eating. Drinking an absurd amount of alcohol to kill the mold I more than likely ate. See you bitches on the other side