Ryan "The dog ate Dan Scott's transplant" Hart

why do we need the NBA when my friend Charles can dunk using a ladder

There's going to be a new show where she goes door to door on Coruscant deporting all of Star Wars' weird little guys

I know Tim Cook is just trying to protect his company but saying the president is a “well endowed and quite generous lover” seems a bit too far

Didn’t want to believe this was true. It’s true.

Being awful to Americans who honorably served the country for nearly two decades, just to be bigots.

screenshot of article from the new york times *spits* that reads: Cornyn Says F.B.I. Will Help Find Texas Lawmakers Who Fled State The senator said the federal agency had agreed to help locate Democratic state lawmakers who left the state to try to block a vote on new congressional district maps. J. David Goodman By J. David Goodman Aug. 7, 2025, 9:32 a.m. ET Senator John Cornyn, a Texas Republican, said on Thursday that the F.B.I. had agreed to his request to help track down dozens of Democratic Texas state lawmakers who left the state to prevent a vote on a redistricting plan. The activation of federal agents could create a standoff between the Trump administration and state leaders in Illinois, where some of the absent Democrats have taken refuge. It was not clear on Thursday morning whether federal agents had taken any action yet in the case, or what role they might eventually play. The whereabouts of the Texas lawmakers are widely known, but until now at least, they had considered themselves safe from arrest because they were far from the jurisdiction of Texas law enforcement agencies. “I am proud to announce that Director Kash Patel has approved my request for the F.B.I. to assist state and local law enforcement in locating runaway Texas House Democrats,” Mr. Cornyn said in a statement. “I thank President Trump and Director Patel for supporting and swiftly acting on my call for the federal government to hold these supposed lawmakers accountable.”

The FBI hunting down Texas Democrats like they're Ted Bundy seems pretty bad

After hours the hood filters come in handy

Our kitchen door was across the alley, and maybe half a block down from the Mounties, in full view of their parking lot. We used to sit out there and get high after every rush, but we were also out there for cigarettes like every half hour so they never really paid attention.

But most paydays they just paid all my deductions to the government, and I would occasionally take some cash out of the till (with permission) for weed.

Sounds like the year my parents decided to buy a restaurant. He was a psych aide and she was an RPN, and my brother and I were both cooking at the time. I got paid a good wage on paper. But I was living in their basement and eating (and drinking) for free at work.

FREE DA DRIZZ

Serve your country! Defend your culture!

Just in case it’s not already clear that ICE is a white supremacist thug army, Homeland Security is recruiting with a “defend your culture” slogan.

This is an absolute betrayal to people who faithfully served their country. There is not a single Republican on earth who gets to utter the lie that they “care about our troops” now

But the sanctity of women's sports, amirite

i’ve been watching old lou reed interviews and i’m obsessed with this 50 year old interview and his response to being asked if he identifies as a transvestite or homosexual

The Great Khan has scored another victory, and I want more states to do this.

people are literally doing this and are too dim to realize it

No one should ever have the power to autonomously cancel hundreds of millions of dollars for scientific research based on some lies they saw on YouTube.

I don't think he's even seen the show he just wanted a big mug all the time.

I think the dude who lived in my basement stole my Troy and Abed in the Morning mug when he left.

Two characters who bring me joy

Deporting gardeners who've worked honestly for 20 years and letting Kadyrov's babysitter fight for the UFC.

France wildfire: Blaze is 'catastrophe on an unprecedented scale' The huge wildfire is the largest in France so far this year and has burned an area larger than Paris.

And if it isn't Canada or America's west coast again it's Australia. Or Russia. Japan. You-name-it.

There's always been wildfires but it's never been this bad. Again, this was all predicted and every single chance we've had to fix it has been stopped in its tracks by a "leader" exactly like you /4

"I just don't care."

Never mind, pretty sure I know.

It's a "fix your heart or die" situation. Literally

I'm just struck by this because man, nothing says "your state is failing" quite like "no one appears to be in charge of dealing with rotting human body parts strewn around"

I think you should have a relationship with a woman because you expect a man to react and think like a woman. Our neural structure is not the same as a woman's, it can't be. So you are wrong to have expectations. Accept men as they are. Because that's who we are. Pretending to take care of you is also very boring. Don't make us pretend. Because we're not women. If you want to be with a man, don't expect attention. It's not in our nature. Our brains don't work that way. If we asked you to think superficially, not insensitive and detailed like men, could you do it? No, you can't. Because you are women. Stop being a princess. We're not your fathers. We can never care as much as your father. It's our nature. This is our physiology and neurology. Accept it. This does not make us indifferent. It doesn't make us irresponsible. It doesn't make us bad husbands, bad boyfriends, bad men. Stop asking us to be something we cannot be. Stop judging us with your own feminine prejudices and femini

This dude: this is who we are, if you won't accept it you'll die alone with wine and cats!

Women: what kind of wine?

This dude: why won't women fix the Male Loneliness Epidemic?

Fuck yes, this is true. But it would never be talked about on the news channels that show those companies commercials. It's glaringly obvious to anyone paying attention. Prices are MUCH higher than inflation and have been for the last 6 years.