mau

i really need to start saying more silly things on here

yall still here?🫣

😇🫡

our coworkers dont even know how hard we are flexing on them

what listening to underground music at work feels like

i never left! also we miss u on twitter:/

freaky ass bartender asking me if i want pickle backshots?!!

i knew i could count on u🫡

criminal that they have more likes than me tho😔

trying to think of original things to skeet that i havent already tweeted

shows in languages youve never heard

been getting really into tv lately… been watching shows that you wouldnt even imagine

amazing, just what i wanted to see

hell ya

everyone is complaining and rightfully so bc what are those genre categories…?

okay, i need to see some spotify wrappeds on here!!🗣️

ohhh that makes more sense… thank u for educating me

i dont think anyone taught jesus how to dougie…

needless to say it never worked😔

i never got the job:/

when i was a kid, i used to bag my parents groceries as fast as possible, in hopes that the store would offer me a job on the spot

lets gooo!! we have a lot of work to do… its u and me against the world tbh

boooo🍅

are there any oxford comma haters on this app? or will i stand alone on this hill?

*depressed crustacean*
“im krilling myself”

i call her alvin cuz she got big cheeks like a chipmunk

they said they never seen two chill lil guy best friends… explain this then

BREAKING: chill ass lil dude spotted on bluesky

i feel like i have a secret second family

dont forget an adderall!!😋