My AI keeps calling me a "fucking loser"
04.03.2026 00:12 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0My AI keeps calling me a "fucking loser"
04.03.2026 00:12 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Okay I'm just gonna throw this out there: Breakfast nachos?
16.02.2026 14:40 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Nobody has ever been as nice to me as every person who works at a Nando's
15.02.2026 12:09 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Who is producing all this pasta making content for the MTA?
05.02.2026 01:18 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Dang it I got named in the dang Epstein files!
31.01.2026 00:44 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0I'm "Kentucky sober" (only drink bourbon)
27.01.2026 20:32 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Eleven is also called a banker's dozen
24.01.2026 17:07 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Are we all just putting bay leaves in our soups just because our moms did?
16.01.2026 05:47 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0The Pitt is just ER plus Bluey
15.01.2026 05:11 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0All my money is tied up in domain names I will never use
07.12.2025 15:25 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I used to like crunchy peanut butter but now I like creamy. People can change.
02.12.2025 14:19 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0You don't really notice until you're going through a breakup, but it is WILD how many songs are about breakups
02.12.2025 00:52 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"OK! Now I know! That's WHY WE'RE DOING the rehearsal!"
18.09.2025 12:52 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"Howcome Dogs Don't Have to Wipe Their Butts" and 100 Other Questions for People Who Hate Wiping Their Butts
07.09.2025 16:20 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Business idea: rental car company but it's convenient at all
28.08.2025 17:52 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0The Electric City is electric tonight!
01.06.2025 02:37 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Severance but just for pooping
26.05.2025 00:59 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Those last 50 lbs are so stubborn!
21.05.2025 22:22 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0So...is there a Mr. Dash?
16.05.2025 22:53 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0New pope, new me!
08.05.2025 20:14 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0New pope, who dis?
08.05.2025 20:13 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Wait a minute, you guys are putting your eggs in baskets!?
05.04.2025 21:37 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0If they made the black box out of the same stuff the plane is made out of, they wouldn't have to go looking for something every time there is a plane crash
03.04.2025 14:34 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Aw it's officially Opening Day when Nate is live-tweeting his call reactions!
27.03.2025 22:46 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Coffee shop I'm at just straight up has Stairway to Heaven playing
19.03.2025 13:51 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0You ever voice your darkest thoughts when the blender’s on?
06.03.2025 11:28 — 👍 20 🔁 2 💬 3 📌 1
Tim Robinson in the “TABLES” sketch saying “it’s the same actor I don’t know if it’s supposed to be the same person”
Me watching Severance:
28.02.2025 00:51 — 👍 366 🔁 47 💬 5 📌 0
Stop calling me that!
20.02.2025 00:07 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Adult ghost tour guide saying “this is the worst day I’ve had on this job”
Adult ghost tour guide saying “you can drink if you want, and we can say whatever the hell we want”
me on weekdays vs me on the weekend:
07.02.2025 14:53 — 👍 104 🔁 7 💬 2 📌 0If you don't faint every time you stand up you are not standing up fast enough
05.02.2025 20:54 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0