Mystery

[mildly inconvenienced kristi noem to her noem dog] i just can't do this noemore, *bang*

I'm worried when Kristi Noem finds out she's been fired she's going to become America's first obedience school shooter.

back to the sandbox (for logistical reasons)

the ground invasion of iran will save the united states billions of dollars

think of all the desert tan vehicles that won't need to be repainted

this really is just DOGE all over again but with foreign policy isn't it, "we don't understand how this department/country works but it's bad so we'll just destroy it and hopefully someone will make something better"

wait you're telling me the people who renamed it the "department of war" were never interested in peace?

don't tell anyone, but every time i have a performance review scheduled i just start a war with iran

didn't think this would ever be relevant again but here we are

making a quantity of decisions has a quality of its own

"bear in the big blue house" would never succeed today, they would have to make "bear in the small blue overpriced studio apartment"

"bear in the big blue house" would never succeed today, they would have to make "bear in the small blue overpriced studio apartment"

I miss when you could post Brave Norman Rockwell Townsperson and the caption could be, like, “R.E.M was wrong to leave ‘Fretless’ off of Out of Time” instead of “The secret police should stop murdering people.”

UPDATE

poll results:

WaPo headline:

UPDATE

poll results:

WaPo headline:

BREAKING: Emperor's Clothing Index to stop reporting numbers

At first glance I thought this was a map of southern France and the Iberian peninsula

BREAKING: Emperor's Clothing Index to stop reporting numbers

guys what's the over/under on a crunchwrap supreme during rush hour? i need to make rent this month

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"you too can utilize your ring doorbell camera to reunite lost dogs with their owners, missing children with their parents, and enemies of the state with the authorities!"

"you too can utilize your ring doorbell camera to reunite lost dogs with their owners, missing children with their parents, and enemies of the state with the authorities!"

So uh Ring just up and said they've got a huge centralized private surveillance network they can leverage all at once huh

60 years ago today, mild-mannered jim bowl was bitten by a radioactive spider

how did epstein even have time to do all the pedophile stuff, sending TWO emails is like a full day activity for me and yet he apparently had regular correspondence with a significant percentage of the total population of earth

He's unfortunately the only dem who I think might stand a good chance that actually seems to be going "no we don't just need to 'defend democracy', we need to go on the offensive and crush authoritarianism" while people like Schumer are trying to argue that the secret police simply need body cameras

how did epstein even have time to do all the pedophile stuff, sending TWO emails is like a full day activity for me and yet he apparently had regular correspondence with a significant percentage of the total population of earth

i was expecting women smoking, drinking, and dancing, instead we got a bunch of idiots flapping their gums nonstop

remember everyone, the WaPo is now "principled and unbiased", just like it was during the entire existence of the 3rd reich

The Washington Post-truth

just in case the racist chuds finding out all their favorite MAGA twitter accounts are run out of bangladesh and nigeria wasn't embarrassing enough, now it comes to light that their hero secret police agents executing libs in the street are named jesus and raymundo