Jeef

I reckon the BBC should base the made up compo payment on how many Floridians have paid the licence fee. They could settle for £174.50

Is that $1 Billion emotional support package a carefully considered evaluation or just a number plucked from an orange arse?

Really hoping the BBC goes all in against that orange toerag to get their full money’s worth. Imagine how hard you could go for that £1,000,000,000 compo claim

UK Safety Alert over Free Range prisoners.
Government requests full recall

Evil doers: 'Morecambe or Sheffield Wednesday - which team can we destroy next?' As another 100-year-old football club is potentially being run into the ground by a sad excuse of an owner, see which other opportunistic scumbags are ready to ruin your local club.

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/evil-do...

Poor Sheffield Wednesday.....time to repost this again

Betfred holds 7,500 hostages over tax freedom demands Betfred are willing to dispose of thousands of innocent employees if the government fails to drop their massive, unrealistic, excessive tax on their massive, unrealistic, excessive profits.The terrori...

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/betfred...

Massive, unapologetic Die Hard reference

In order to stop Trump totally destroying the White House East Wing, why don't the Democrats quickly put a statue of a Confederate General in there?

Trump said the ballroom "won't interfere with the current building...be near it but not touching it."
Then clearly smashes Whitehouse.
Trump on E Jean Carroll “never met her,” and “never touched her”
Found guilty in civil court for sexual abuse.

I actually have a rare medical condition in which my shits don't sweat

"Prince" Andrew could save on stationary costs by crossing out the "Pri" and replacing it with "No"

Richard III was always a controversial King, but he did have some interesting solutions on rehousing Princes

Due to recent Duke cancellations, York will be issued with a replacement nonce service. We apologise for this inconvenience

The banned ex Duke of York, he had ten thousand women,
He trafficked them to an island,
And trafficked them back again,
When he was up he was...right I'm stopping there

City of York to rebrand The city of York is to be renamed, to avoid it being associated with disreputable ne’er-do-wellsWith the main culprit being the sweatless Duke of 'York', the city is fed up of hearing its name in the ...

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/city-of...

One sweatless Duke removed, taking the win

No Kings for USA, No Dukes for York. That'll do nicely

Prince Andrew is giving up his Duke of York title. Get in. I think we can now shoot him with a bow and arrow if he is caught within the city walls

Even if it's just modelling for a book cover, Vincent D'Onofrio just nails it every time

EA Games bought by Saudi Investment Group.....it'll be fine Electronic Arts make some of the most popular video games, what are some of the expected new features now Mohammed bin Salman is definitely not involved. • The Sims – You can now dismember your Sims w...

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/ea-game...
I wonder why gaming journalists will be giving 5 star reviews to all EA games from now on...

Michelle Mone may be aware of £122 Million Gown Fraud verdict PPE Medpro is to payback the £122,000,000 to the government for gown fraud. The agreement is to pay £100 a month for the next one million years. There are also the additional costs and interest to pay...

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/michell...

I can't believe her and Baron Silas Greenback still have their titles. Evil toads eh?

Apparently you get to keep your Baroness title if your medical gown scam costs the government less than £125,000,000. Playing it close there Michelle Mone, with only £122,000,000

Russia appalled that politicians taking bribes is illegal The Kremlin is disgusted at the massive mis-justice that Nathan Gill, the former leader of Reform UK Wales, who was always an upstanding gent, is found guilty of long term borrowing of their rubles. H...

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/russia-...

If the Nathan Gill story has dropped off in overall media coverage, then I will write my own...

Anyone else fed up of the non stop news coverage of Reform UK’s ex-leader in Wales, Nathan Gill, pleading guilty to bribery charges? It's Russian money this, pro Brexit bribes that....so much coverage and Reform apologies...

Interviewer: So what weird wild animal based excuse do you have that explains why you keep failing to provide proper reports on your autism findings?

RFK Junior: Paracetamol

US Congressman Jamie Raskin has had some choice words with the leader of the Farage Party plc. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Would watch again

England thrashed by South Africa so quickly in Cricket ODI, they have changed the name to Half Day International

Genuine congrats to Zach Polanski as the new leader of the Green Party, wonder if there was a new leader of Reform it would get equal media attention...

Evil doers: 'Morecambe or Sheffield Wednesday - which team can we destroy next?' As another 100-year-old football club is potentially being run into the ground by a sad excuse of an owner, see which other opportunistic scumbags are ready to ruin your local club.

It ain't much, but I wrote this for a comedy news website. To draw a bit of attention and to raise a smile. Do with this as you want.
www.newsbiscuit.com/post/evil-do...

Evil doers: 'Morecambe or Sheffield Wednesday - which team can we destroy next?' As another 100-year-old football club is potentially being run into the ground by a sad excuse of an owner, see which other opportunistic scumbags are ready to ruin your local club.

www.newsbiscuit.com/post/evil-do...

Shrimper solidarity

Good news for adulterous scumbags, if you ever get caught together on a big screen at an event, do the Coldplay embarrassed hiding thing and you can pretend you are just doing a funny bit with a "friend". How delightful

Surely if Trump doesn't want anyone to see the Epstein Files, all he has to do is lock his bathroom door?