@vermhatswormhat.bsky.social
Author of “The Comprehensive Guide to Avoiding Eye Contact”
Crushing these openers.
26.06.2025 19:04 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I’ve been dating again recently and have now gone on several dates where I’ve been asked less than three questions. The bar is so unbelievable low, that just inquiring about the person you are with will put you ahead of the pack
06.06.2025 19:55 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
The perfect women doesn’t exi…
06.06.2025 19:53 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Showing my friends some exercises I learned in yoga to fix my lower back only to have them reply they know those exercises just under a different names like ‘landmines’ instead of ‘the dolphin’
06.06.2025 19:53 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Whether is a 10 or 30 minute drive my cars AC only seems to really start working about 2 minutes before I get to my destination.
30.05.2025 20:20 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0🫡
30.05.2025 00:03 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Millennials when another appalling J.K. Rowling story comes out.
29.05.2025 23:44 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Boss: You must begin gene picks, listen to cell decay, seven days.”
Employee: (barely listening) got it.
Thank you!
16.05.2025 05:36 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
One of the things I hate about traveling is having to try all the new food. Luckily they have all my favorites in Berlin!
15.05.2025 19:24 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0It’s always good morning, I think you have sleep apnea, and never, I had a great time last night.
05.05.2025 16:15 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Disney Adults - Harry Potter Adults
19.04.2025 12:41 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0All this talk about group chats sounds awesome. I’d love to be a part of one someday.
26.03.2025 01:54 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
26.03.2025 01:18 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
100%
25.03.2025 19:20 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Are men not allowed to have hobbies anymore?!
24.03.2025 00:58 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Da best
22.03.2025 00:45 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
21.03.2025 03:41 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Men want to hear one thing when you throw on your sex playlist, and thats Ladies and gentlemen, this is Mambo Number Five.
20.03.2025 23:27 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0Millennials will fly halfway around the world and just share pictures of espresso martinis like they do in their hometown.
20.03.2025 16:06 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
But if not no worries
19.03.2025 16:36 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
This would be so nice to pop on the TV next holiday season. 🎄
19.03.2025 02:17 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Followed this with a couple of small tweaks! www.instagram.com/reel/C_PApeL...
16.03.2025 20:15 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Going to start paying close attention to the safety instructions before takeoff now.
14.03.2025 18:25 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0The moon was pretty spectacular at 12k feet, but none of the pictures will do it justice.
14.03.2025 03:49 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Halfway
14.03.2025 01:03 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Climbing a mountain and skiing down for full moon tonight. Will report back later.
13.03.2025 22:32 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 1
Remembered they actually made alcoholic Monsyers right after they sent this. I MEANT THE NA VERSION.
13.03.2025 22:30 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I’ll take a white monster on the rocks please
13.03.2025 22:23 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Back to shit posting in a sec, but let’s celebrate. I just graduated from ski instructing school from the National Sports Centered for the Disabled. I can now train adaptive skiing for all cognitive and physical disabilities! 🎉
13.03.2025 20:06 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
