Bridget Callahan

I was this many years old when I realized adamantium = add-it-to-a-man-tium.

I will not watch Eurovision the movie a 4th time I will not watch Eurovision the movie a 4th time I will not watch Eurovision the movie a 4th time I will not watch Eurovision the movie a 4th time I will not watch Eurovision the movie a 4th time this month

me: i let my cat drink the bathtub water while i was in it
priest: once again kind of weird but not a sin

WIRED EXCLUSIVE: WE LET A CHIMPANZEE TALK DIRECTLY TO GOOGLE'S NEW GENERATIVE AI AND THREE PEOPLE IN THE DATA CENTER DIED

Them: AI will be so powerful!

Me: please teach IG that I don't need to see 10,000 ads for a product I just bought, I will pay a premium, swear to god

Shameful that Biden didn't address or even mention these in his State of the Union.

one musician in the conversation? fine.

two? okay, as long as they're outnumbered.

three is passable but dangerous.

four? They're gonna start using noises instead of words. rum pum pum. batatatat. go home.

The Lord gives his largest trucks to his least capable of healthy emotional processing subjects

This makes me unreasonably happy.

Also in the running: the death of the NotTildaSwinton Twitter account.

I see clearly now the exact moment I became a Digital Elder and it was Jan.7th, 2015, when FB announced it was pivoting to video.

[boardroom table]

boss: be sure to finish all of your deliverables

me: ok (i pretend to take a big spoonful of deliverables but really i sneak them under the table for the dog)

The next two weeks will be the internet trying to sell me chocolate and lingerie and fatty liver supplements, when all I really want for Valentine's Day is a wet saw and raw opals.

Americans are obsessed with "wellness" because we are currently living through a "complete healthcare collapse."

When I was little, I was obsessed with miniatures but had no focus or patience to ever actually finish a dollhouse.

So my BF spending days intensively folding and gluing tiny, tiny pieces together to build this set is the hottest thing ever. Even though he apologized every hour for "being a dork."

I don't know who she was, but my first thought was "oh! thrifty!"

It is impossible for me to get $10 million tomorrow without robbing a bank, therefore I should be allowed to do it

Finally back walking (very slowly) in the sand after surgery, and what do I see my very first visit of 2024? Just a bunch of mysterious, awesome shells on parade for no discernible reason.

When I die, this is what I want done with my shell collection too.

Definitely the funniest and most confusing thing I've seen today:

One of the Most Audacious Pranks in History Was Hidden in a Hit TV Show for Years. Not Everyone Foun... Abortion activism, anti-gun propaganda, and HIV awareness, smuggled onto prime time.

This piece about how a radical art collective planted subversive props in 3 years' worth of Melrose Place episodes (and made Aaron Spelling look very stupid) has quite simply changed my life

the English language is based just enough on Dutch that everything you might say in Dutch sounds like someone making fun of Dutch

Doug Tallamy's book about oaks is great, especially if you really care about caterpillars.

Oak Reading Day: A single blue jay can bury 4,500 acorns during a mast year. Jays and oaks evolved together starting 65 million years ago in Southeast Asia, and because the average jay inadvertently plants thousands of acorns, oaks as a species moved faster around the world than any other tree.

The main thing is I'm here and not online gambling or shopping on Insta.