She Wag on my Richard till I ner

she asked for "chill and musical"
I asked if opera was ok
now we're listening to Wagner

My contribution to the apartment decor

Call me Big pharma, getting that Reddit karma

Dudes out here jutting their knees into the aisle and glaring at you when you bump into them

The score screen for a game of StarCraft II that shows I'm in master league with an MMR of 2675

Never ask a man how much money he makes, a woman how much she weighs, or a master ranked StarCraft II player what their MMR is.

At first I hated the idea that baby yoda could be the next mandalor, but now I want him to usher in the next mandalorian empire and say "the way, this is".

Sometimes girlfriend wants you to be big and strong, sometimes attentive and supportive, and sometimes she wants you to go get her leafs

Shout out to the patient Factorio construction bots who can wait much longer than they should for another bot to place landfill where they need it.

I just want to play the bass so good it's played over NPR's report of the stock exchange

An upside-down pig of a cat taking up a whole couch cushion

Having to share a couch with this fat fuck is a wonderful struggle

I love that the legacy of Inferno Cop is still strong at Trigger studio

Healing potions are actually just carbonated fruit punch Gatorade.

Nothing like sharing some cheese and balance whine with a friend

My partner and I were streaming Lost World on our Roku last night and had to bump the volume up to 50 (highest it's ever been) and then got BLASTED when I started watching YouTube, which usually sounds normal at around 11, after the movie.

Hopefully this will prevent that from happening again

Just imagine David Attenborough talking about the Cultosaurus Erectus

I consider bananas, oranges, tangerines, and lychee to be very appealing fruits

Duke's rate of liquidi-cat-ion has a linear correlation to his PPM (purrs per minute)

Realizing I can name my cities in syd Meyer's Civilization always feels like an epiphany.

My pasta is enriched by MSG and Getz

Egg over rice topped with siracha and green onion in a square bowl

E G G

Egg

I'm pulling the stop cord before everyone else; the bus will ding for me and me alone

*puts isopods in box* now kiss :)

I don't always get to see the Wrigley clocktower at this hour, but it was definitely picture worthy last night. Also I think we could give another try at Zeppelins.

At least give us the Colonel Sanders of pizza