There's a guy at Dollar Tree right now trying to figure out how to frame it as a "Premium Product".
13.02.2026 03:31 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0There's a guy at Dollar Tree right now trying to figure out how to frame it as a "Premium Product".
13.02.2026 03:31 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I was Henry VIII's 7th wife.
27.01.2026 21:06 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0What if instead, we invaded Graceland for a fried peanut butter and nanner sammich?
23.01.2026 03:41 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0This whole maudlin state that the Republic is in can be directly traced to taking the cocaine out of many popular and tasty patent-medicines.
21.11.2025 07:11 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"Country Style Spread" - Fond memories of Mamaw Perot in the kitchen - hydrogenating seed oils.
15.11.2025 01:46 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Modern caselaw seems to be reliant of the doctrine of "we can't get the toothpaste back into the tube."
26.10.2025 21:57 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
It's only a "gambling scandal" if you're one of the losers.
Anyway, lemme get 10 on the hard 8.
Movie Review: The Matrix
Take a pill to go live in the equivalent of a Greyhound bus and eat cat food schmoo.
Pretty realistic. 8/10
Live
Laugh
Litigate
I'm off to represent the entire red army at the buffet.
12.09.2025 01:16 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0What a unremarkable day. I think I'll have a spaghetti dinner.
10.09.2025 23:10 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I wanted to be a "Sex-O-Lette" but I couldn't pass the math section of the exam.
29.08.2025 04:10 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Employees:
We will be outsourcing the "Finding Out" part of FAFO from this point on.
"The Confederacy" was the Washington Generals of their day.
#johnbrownwasright
To quote Donna DeMarco: "My husbands in the ocean, gambling."
02.08.2025 12:36 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I'm going off the rails on a Gravy Train.
02.08.2025 12:31 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0OSHA has really put a dent in the "supervillain falling into vat of toxic goo" origin stories numbers.
09.07.2025 21:03 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Today someone will be Declaring their Independence from their fingers.
04.07.2025 15:16 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I'm very amazed how much the huffing ones farts pipeline has accelerated in this AI-Slop future we live in.
01.07.2025 05:37 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
The hell with #waymo , #SpeedBuggy is the only autonomous car I'll get into.
21.06.2025 19:39 — 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
After a lengthy meeting with the finance department, we have determined we will just be taking your money and not providing any goods or services in return.
Onward to profitablity!
Enjoy, Consumers!
Does Pete Hegseth have to blow into a tube to start up the Pentagon?
04.06.2025 04:39 — 👍 2 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0I once had a ingrown brain.
31.05.2025 02:08 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Blind Boxes are Precious Moments figurines, but for young people.
19.05.2025 15:22 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Suddenly the government doesn't want you to have #floride . What is the government hiding and why are they trying to suppress this cheap and effective treatment? #bigpharma
14.05.2025 04:29 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I have not conceded and am actively working to get the fraudulent and very illegal ballots that were not for me thrown out.
08.05.2025 17:20 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Who was elected #antipope ? youtu.be/FxxhAS16vB0?...
08.05.2025 17:18 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"Looking at your 401K is woke" #trumpslump
01.05.2025 02:30 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Senator Grassley (R-IA) then proceeded to put an onion on his belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the #trumptarrifs . The only ones he could get were the big yellow ones.
17.04.2025 17:15 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
I run a Pub Trivia night for morons. Questions include:
"Name a TV show."
"Write down a number."
"Did you see a movie recently?"
"True/False - Football is played with a football."
Please give me more ideas for questions!