Ariaster Grande

Born to piss, forced to shit

Me a year ago: people who complain about Vancouver's rain are soft children, it's easy to power through a drizzle, it may not be great but it's better than five months of ice or humid thunderstorms

Me now: what if david duchovny was right

Why were we all so mean to Barney as soon as we turned like 8

You guys

Beat-up twink in a leather jacket holding a firearm

Hi bluesky i just saw Novocaine and i will not be shutting up about it, thanks

Give it to the birds

Airbuds screenshot of the two most opposite artists that the user listened to this year, Sabrina Carpenter and Cursive

This is a good summary of who i am tbh thanks Airbuds

Forgot how annoying it is to get used to a new iPhone. Here's my hand

Why were we all so mean to Barney as soon as we turned like 8

Pansexual elastic bands

A screenshot from the ConcertArchives app that reads, "18 years ago, you saw: All American Rejects / Motion City Soundtrack / Boys Like Girls"

I think the most hurtful part of this is that 2006 was 18 years ago

Can you imagine how hard a "BRAT" lip tattoo would've gone in 2008

if you see this, post an image you saved because it made you laugh

I keep thinking i might be finally starting to feel better but then i get hit in the face with a hot flash or a bad sneezing fit and then i realize i am simply cursed.

The cracking sound has never left me

“I don’t care who hates me” and then his dogs ate him

A screenshot from Instacart that says, "Please secure your pets"

The user's pet, secured

Also being referred to as "rantch" is decidedly hilarious

How does this thing already know me from less than 50 posts

A quick, sharp, "HEY" in my mom's voice would fix them

The temptation to yell at children on the bus just to spook them out of being shitty to their mom

I just noticed the really unfortunate word-cutoff

I hate gaining wisdom through painful life experience, I miss being a big stupid dummy

Wow that was musical whiplash

Been seeing a lot of videos that hold space for you

As if this woman didn't literally give BIRTH TO ME

Omg we have those white ones, they were hanging off the new cat tree and Willoughby immediately pulled them off