‘Old Person Smell’ is real. I plan on smelling like Chanel and cigarettes.
03.03.2026 15:00 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0‘Old Person Smell’ is real. I plan on smelling like Chanel and cigarettes.
03.03.2026 15:00 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I just ordered a cat themed comforter set to prove your taste does, in fact, get better with age.
27.02.2026 04:11 — 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0Laid back, with my mind on my shitposts and my shitposts on my mind.
26.02.2026 01:11 — 👍 52 🔁 18 💬 2 📌 0shitposters are fartists
23.02.2026 00:29 — 👍 113 🔁 42 💬 9 📌 0I had a black sun tramp stamp in the 90s. Pure class.
23.02.2026 03:54 — 👍 9 🔁 3 💬 2 📌 0I’d take my teeth out for you.
22.02.2026 03:48 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Just fuck me hard to Wham!.
19.02.2026 14:57 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I refuse to work at a place I hate. So my new job lasted 2 days. Oh well.
19.02.2026 14:51 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0My boob itches. Someone’s coming with a hole in their britches.
18.02.2026 01:18 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0The award for the most awkward sex scene goes to The Ninth Gate. Grody !
11.02.2026 03:09 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0Thanks!
11.02.2026 01:28 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I lisped my way through the interview and got hired! Good bye truck stop!
10.02.2026 23:51 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 2 📌 0With all my aches and pains, if I were a car, I'd fail inspection every year.
10.02.2026 13:19 — 👍 100 🔁 50 💬 5 📌 0
Trump: "Nobody understands a word this guy is saying."
Fact: 59 million Americans speak Spanish. Imagine if they all turned against you, you'd never win anything ever again.
I never said “ used ta could” until I got these fucking partials! Take care of your teeth, kids!
10.02.2026 01:44 — 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
❤️🎶🐰
09.02.2026 11:45 — 👍 5909 🔁 963 💬 83 📌 37So if mother fuckers think I was born with this lisp, maybe I’ll get free weed.
10.02.2026 01:32 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
This
09.02.2026 20:42 — 👍 16 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0I have two interviews tomorrow. Hopefully I’ll get to tell the truck stop good bye!
10.02.2026 01:08 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0If they make me work alone today, I’ll quit. Just wait.
09.02.2026 15:19 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
People that say no to a third slice of pizza
1. Why would you?
2. How could you?
One day you’re cute. The next day you wake up with partial dentures and six cats.
08.02.2026 02:28 — 👍 12 🔁 7 💬 0 📌 0gonna start tagging uninvolved people in skeet conversations
07.02.2026 21:12 — 👍 133 🔁 22 💬 10 📌 3I'm almost wishing for an alien invasion. We could use some good news.
07.02.2026 14:34 — 👍 207 🔁 89 💬 13 📌 4
In California:
07.02.2026 15:30 — 👍 14449 🔁 3183 💬 423 📌 165
Where are all the idiots who have defended Trump against claims that he's a racist?
He's a virulent racist...and if you support him, you are, too.
I said what I said.
President Barrack Obama looking cheekily thoughtful
Your Black History Moment
Not in The Epstein Files.
If we were to bring back dueling, we would have a lot less offended people.
06.02.2026 13:30 — 👍 109 🔁 63 💬 6 📌 2I’m not pretty enough to be fat. Yo-yo diet begins tomorrow.
03.02.2026 05:27 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0