sloppyanna

their obsession with being able to track their bf/gf through location tracking..........

mesmerized by my heterosexual coworkers

Everybody on the Mighty Nein is genderqueer until further notice!!!

After waiting for 10 minutes he walked up and said "hey uhhhh do you want the sauce.....on the wings?"

Went to the corner wing place where it's usually a woman with 6 inch hot pink acrylics who knows my order [extra wet, extra hot] but this time it was a guy who took my order and he fucked my order uppppppp

the mighty nein good

Wizard of Oz deserves its status as a classic piece of cinema but it's also so wild that every story from its production is like, "The producers decided to use face paint that was laced with benzos and ground up copper which kept the actor from being able to breathe during filming"

Straight couple at this show grinding on each other to chappell roan oh honey I dont think so

had a major breakthrough with my boss recently [jokingly threatened to slash his tires during a team meeting].

My job has been advertising a book and jewelry sale for like a week I was looking forward to......these bitches only had ugly jewelry and the books were mostly kids books, christian devotionals, and cookbooks I could steal from any gas station.

Like a breed

What is a dog that everyone hates

Never mind, they just started a small fire in the front yard

My neighbors have a flat screen TV sitting on the front porch and they're watching Who Wants to Be a Millionaire while sitting in total darkness

sitting in my room just blowing huge wads [of mucus] [i am sick with a sinus infection]

This whole song is crazy. "Mind so sharp i fuck around and cut my head off" and then in the video his head falls off. Peak Wayne

Trump and Clinton?? 😬 I just KNOW that room stunk......

what the fuck is The Devil Wears Prada 2 even supposed to be about?? The first movie ends with her quitting the job and abandoning Miranda.....

just saw Whiplash for the first time. Why did nobody tell me this was a gay film

When I was a kid, unless I was spinning around very fast on a fair ride, I was fine to do most anything, but now if I read more than like, one fucking paragraph in a moving car, or sit in the backseat, I just want to puke

Getting older sucks lmao i was in my boyfriend's car reading about mariah carey while he drove under 30 mph and the motion sickness kicked in so fast i almost projectile vomited

Is it going to be metal

oh good, gay marriage is safe. now all the assimilationist gays can go back to brunch and ignoring any other issues ❤❤❤

Was that a lesbian commercial I just missed

idk who this guy singing on SNL is, but he sounds like a mixture of justin timberlake and jamiroquai

A shirt i just saw an old woman wearing at a street festival:

"DON'T TELL ME
I DON'T HAVE BALLS
I DO HAVE BALLS,
THEY JUST HAPPEN TO
BE ON MY CHEST
AND I GUARANTEE YOU
THEY'RE A LOT
BIGGER THAN YOURS"

Remember when that French fascist got so mad about gay marriage in France that he shot himself in front of over 1,000 people at notre dame? why didn't that trend take off for reactionaries?

One of my coworkers asked everyone to put their favorite GIF in the work chat but I cannot do that because my favorite GIF is the one of the two guys fucking sideways and the top starts slamming a laptop screen shut on the bottom's head over and over again.

Today in the relaxation room [again, not a break room], someone is in the other massage chair next to me on the phone talking LOUDLY. I wish I was as shameless and oblivious as her

Why the fuck did this post in all caps