Mal

sure the pedophile felon president just illegally bombed a country that may have nukes while federal forces under his command murder and harass people in america and immigrants are tortured and he moves forward with plans to build concentration camps and sorry idk where i was going fuck all of this

It would be ironic if the first winner of the FIFA Peace Prize personally derailed the World Cup.

Listen, you're the one that's obligatory Tifosi. No one makes fun of Ferrari as much as you do except for Ferrari fans.

This is so much more inspiring and wholesome than when I used do a Bachelor/Bachelorette/Bachelor in Paradise "Hate Bake" while live-tweeting throughout the episode.

I vote that we start with the girl that lived behind the dairy queen so she could be closer to her mom that was in prison.

If you're going to bring back the music videos, you should introduce your new followers to some of Ken's Dating Stories.

He used to be a NASCAR announcer so he's definitely knowledgeable about motorsports, but I believe he once told me that the only thing he knows about F1 is that Ferrari will always sabotage themselves.
Unfortunately, for the past few years, I've been unable to prove him wrong.

I think so, and I think Japan (which is after China) is at, like, midnight or 1 am EST.

Dude. We should go to Vegas this year.

Listen, Ken has a years-long history of making fun of Ferrari team failures.
If he decides to become an F1 fan, it’s only fair he embraces the Tifosi life.
(I’m a Merc girlie)

China is the second race of the season and it starts at 03:00 EST

I'm gonna make you a Ferrari F1 fan this year (they might actually be good this year, believe it or not) so you can say goodbye to sleeping in until 7 on Sundays.

I hesitate to say Jeff Hays makes the series “better,” but I know I’ll never be able to read the text with the same level of enjoyment now that I’ve listed to the audiobooks.

So… I work from home and recently had to buy a 60” wide cabinet for my excessive hoard of 3d printer filament.
Now I want to put it to good use and print whistles for Marie.

I’m sorry, what???

a man with a ring on his finger is sitting on a couch with the word schitts creek on the bottom ALT: a man with a ring on his finger is sitting on a couch with the word schitts creek on the bottom

*thinks about the grade of @redsoxredshoes.bsky.social’s driveway and what it must be like during Midwest winter*

*chuckles*

Wait. Hold on. There's a lot to unpack but I'm stuck on this one part.

When women are asked if they would rather be alone with a bear or a man... this guy thinks women are responding with "bear" because he thinks we WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THE BEAR????

This is a deepfake.

We had a Skinny Jeans and Tevas Sandal Fan book club meeting in Olathe yesterday and she was definitely there.

Someone from the wide leg jean industrial complex is trying to frame us.

I don't see anything

Ok, but if you get the van, you need to do a wrap on it in the same aesthetic vein as your golf outfits.

Ken, I love you dearly, so I mean this with all the care in the world...

Please don't buy a Kei truck equivalent of a van just so you can carry around the baggage dumped on you by *your* trash bag ex.

If you're going to be an emotional junk hauler, at least do it in something like an Audi wagon.

You're really trying to embrace the single life for the foreseeable future, eh?

Not just their clutches. The whole car.
I'm not even being facetious when I tell you that the best $5k I will ever spend is the early lease return penalty I am paying next month to get rid of this god awful MDX.

We actually dream of someone stealing it and taking down an icy road at 70 mph.

Can we file a class action lawsuit? For a platform that allowed unsolicited WIE?

Kentucky voters are weird, man.
They still have that Blue Dog Democrat mindset. The state has an awesome Dem governor but then you get Mitch McConnell, Rand Paul, and Thomas Massie.

(yes, I know Toto is also a CEO but the range would be too vast)

On the scale of Lawrence Stroll to Zak Brown, my opinion of Cadillac CEO Dan Towriss should be a lot closer to Stroll, right?

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If you want to absolutely ensure that you don’t have to worry about women responding to your texts, you could take your normal style and ramp it up a notch, or two.
This shirt is the equivalent of your phone number being blocked.

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I’m gonna recruit @sandmanesq.bsky.social @redsoxredshoes.bsky.social @yesido84.bsky.social and @jkelber.bsky.social to join me in spamming you with model train videos and outfit ideas for your next golf tournament.

Silver lining: you’re not stuck on a bus with food poisoning, like you were in South Korea.

I don’t know bout y’all, but I think I’m a lot more discerning when it comes to potential sexual partners than the people this dude is meeting.
Under no circumstances would I even engage in flirty conversation with someone while still being ignorant of their politics.