how do i turn off notifications for America
07.03.2026 18:02 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0how do i turn off notifications for America
07.03.2026 18:02 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0due to current gas prices, i'm gonna need you to get out of my car and into my dreams.
07.03.2026 17:43 — 👍 121 🔁 42 💬 2 📌 0😂
07.03.2026 17:27 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"Not gonna lie," he lied
24.05.2025 10:26 — 👍 375 🔁 122 💬 15 📌 3Single hot moms in your area don't have time for your shit
29.04.2025 22:54 — 👍 493 🔁 143 💬 31 📌 4Your mother and I met thanks to a starter pack called badass shitposters
25.11.2024 03:34 — 👍 464 🔁 111 💬 6 📌 1brb the crows are calling me outside
06.03.2026 20:38 — 👍 15 🔁 5 💬 0 📌 0she definitely doesn’t want that 😂
06.03.2026 23:58 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Other day I was interviewing a lady and she said "my husband does what you do" and I thought "oh I highly doubt it"
06.03.2026 21:53 — 👍 159 🔁 11 💬 7 📌 0just throwing it out there but i’ve loved barack obama since his first album.
06.03.2026 22:42 — 👍 73 🔁 8 💬 3 📌 0a gap on my resume that says i didn’t fucking feel like it
06.03.2026 23:57 — 👍 19 🔁 6 💬 2 📌 0The gap in my resume is from being released into the wild.
06.03.2026 22:33 — 👍 149 🔁 63 💬 3 📌 0I'll hold your hair back so you don't get any apocalypse on it.
09.11.2025 02:57 — 👍 237 🔁 101 💬 4 📌 0I'm the author of my own life, but I use passive voice and am an unreliable narrator.
09.04.2025 15:38 — 👍 248 🔁 89 💬 10 📌 5
interviewer: tell us about yourself
me: can’t, i’m an unreliable narrator
I tried carbon dating before. After a month, their personality got coal.
04.03.2026 13:20 — 👍 40 🔁 18 💬 3 📌 0Last time i was raptured they were all like no way, bro
06.03.2026 00:12 — 👍 58 🔁 25 💬 1 📌 1Y’all mind if a white boy does a little unreliable narrating
05.03.2026 03:29 — 👍 157 🔁 43 💬 5 📌 1they already updated Markwayne’s Wikipedia page
05.03.2026 19:54 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0so is he going to take her out back and shoot her?
05.03.2026 19:47 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0WE WILL BE WELCOMED AS LIBERATORS, I yell, as I walk into the dive bar I was banned from
03.03.2026 16:58 — 👍 160 🔁 36 💬 3 📌 0do Florida Barbie next
05.03.2026 19:42 — 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0Republicans Senators don’t have to worry about AI making their jobs irrelevant because they are just doing that themselves.
05.03.2026 05:51 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I just know my soulmate out there also never leaving their house.
27.02.2026 19:47 — 👍 172 🔁 64 💬 1 📌 2i saw you replied to my post but also saw you failed to like it, so i guess that’s another sleepless night for me
03.03.2026 18:16 — 👍 16 🔁 5 💬 1 📌 0I’m at the age where my patience has turned into tolerance, and that tolerance is running thin.
03.03.2026 20:09 — 👍 20 🔁 6 💬 2 📌 0hope i never get regime changed
02.03.2026 23:26 — 👍 67 🔁 11 💬 4 📌 1i don’t want to click a link and i don’t want to subscribe to anything what i want is to fight god under the blood moon
03.03.2026 00:19 — 👍 143 🔁 40 💬 3 📌 0