Jack Fields

I have so many questions. Why am I getting this? Why are they bragging about the ball size? Can I borrow someone’s PayPal?

The invention of the car horn had to be a public nuisance. People sudden had a button to make the most disturbing of sounds at will.

Going through my office and found an uncut sheet of Human badges from DEFCON 24.

Thanks gang! Putting this toward a nice dinner for Vi’s Mother’s Day.

Downvotes are coming to Twitter. I’m so screwed.

I really hope these are not real credentials.

This was not the Barry Allen hit piece I thought it would be.

Whatever position creates Xcode error messages

Going the tiniest bit viral has a rebound effect. You get a bunch of followers for a single tweet and then lose a bunch when people realize that you actually talk about the most boring shit on the planet and the original tweet was luck.

Every morning I repeat words of affirmation to myself:

- You are smart
- You are powerful
- You are capable of creating a linked list

Using Xcode after having to deal with Android Studio

You guys secure your Digg usernames?

Sally’s Baking Addiction is going to get Milkshake Ducked and it’s going to upend the culinary world.

Apple has an official juggling team that meets every Friday on the Apple Park lawn.

I could take at least 3 geese in a fight and you can’t convince me otherwise. I am an apex predator made of blue twisted steel. I cannot be stopped by 6 wings and honking.

Absolutely! I like to show these because often people complain about App Review. At the end of the day they are real people doing real work so I like to thank them when I can.

It's crazy how fast App Store review is once you actually push the fucking button to submit to them.

A week. One week. An entire 7 days I waited thinking review was just backed up. Once I realized my error and submitted, it only took an hour to get approved.

The app page optimizations with updated screenshots are performing closely to the original so far but still behind. This conversion rate is pretty rough on all accounts. I suspect the app icon may be playing into this partly so I'm cooking up something new to test it out.

Anything is possible. The impossible just takes a little longer.

You don’t need April Fool’s day. You can just be a menace whenever you want.

I’m so sad to hear of Val Kilmer’s passing. He was an incredible actor through and through, no matter the role. In the words of Doc Holliday:

There's no normal life. There's just life. Now get on with it.

My top wish for WWDC is that App Store Connect gets a session lifetime of more than 15 minutes.

I set a goal to read 12 books this year. So far I’m two in after finishing The Eel Book by Patrik Svennson — a book about the mysteries of eels and the human condition. By far the best book I’ve ever read. Just fantastic.

Gonna need a new Animal Crossing reeeaaaaaal soon.

The existence of Google's Gemini implies there is also an Aries, Taurus, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, and Pisces.

We have reached a point where stating you DONT have AI features in your software is attractive.

Looking at implementing Rive in my apps. Pretty stoked about it.

Locking in for the daily standup.

iPhone 17 Air serves as a testbed for Apple’s future foldable. A true foldable should be as slim as current phones. Each half must be half as thick. The Air lets Apple validate one half before a full rollout.

API cost. Charging for the API is the dumbest thing Twitter has done. It didn't reduce the bot problem and forced tens of millions of people to no longer have access to reliable notifications for emergency situations. Gobsmackingly stupid.