Domestic Grievances

you know you’re a toddler mom when you have to break off every piece of frozen cheese of the hamburgers in order for your kid to eat them.

Toddler Tales: today in the middle of Sam’s Club my 4yo starts yelling “pirate!! pirate!!!” and pointing at a black man in a red durag.

Toddler Tales: 4yo offered me a skittle, i said “awe thanks bud, but I’m good”. And he replied with “but i didn’t rub it on my butthole”.

Wife Grievance #2: when he doesn’t take the trash out, so he just stacks more trash on top of the trash can.

Wife Grievance #1: leaving the frozen waffle bag open free floating in the freezer… because using the reseal tape provided on on the bag, or getting a freezer bag is too hard.