Andrew Stout

Image presiding over this and not immediately resigning in disgrace

Ever think about how the lint trap basically collects our clothes' excrement?

We're all just reaching into the shitter and grabbing clothes turds like it's nothing

Disgusting

A tie score for the Cardinals and Marlins in a sring training game

Like kissing your sister - tie games are the worst part of spring training

a man in a blue shirt is standing in front of a crowd Alt: John Hamm feelin it at the club

When you've gone 3+ months without baseball, and you start the season with an international tournament #WBC

The stupidity of the regime is reflected in gas prices

The evil of the regime is reflected in dead Iranian school children

"Here for a good time, not a longtime" is my eschatology

Sometimes the only ethical use is non-use

I will not be taking questions at any time

Markwayne Mullin

He was supposed to be named Mark but he ate his twin Wayne in utero so now he's Markwayne

Aaron Boone looking cagey

Ernie Clement looking like Aaron Boone

When is Aaron Boone gonna come clean and acknowledge that Ernie Clement is his son?

It's a condemnation of car-centric culture that skyrocketing gas prices probably feels to most of us like an equitable punishment for bombing a school full of children

Kyle Schwarber treating a baseball like it called his mother a whore

a nurse with a stethoscope around her neck and a name tag that says ' a. ' on it Alt: Dana giving a look

Sure about that?

If you're paying for a four-year education, you sure as hell better get more out of it than a job

You gotta believe

I know it isn't "true," but I am 100% convinced that staying hydrated and going for a run will stave off/cure any ailment

Aaron Boone looking cagey

Ernie Clement looking like Aaron Boone

When is Aaron Boone gonna come clean and acknowledge that Ernie Clement is his son?

Sometimes the only ethical use is non-use

I will not be taking questions at any time

I'll be ordering this for the university library where I work. Thanks!

I feel like something is happening

My toxic trait is that I LOVE having documented workflows, and I HATE documenting workflows

A terrifying possibility

Put it in the next Norton Anthology of Poetry

Tr*mp - he could be sleeping, he could be shitting

Let's play a little game called "Sleeping or Shitting?"

It's hilarious only because you know it REALLY matters to him

Markwayne

Bert

Markwayne Mullin is like if Bert Kreischer didn't have a personality

All the man you need

Put it in the next Norton Anthology of Poetry

Markwayne Mullin

He was supposed to be named Mark but he ate his twin Wayne in utero so now he's Markwayne

When I watch Sleepless in Seattle, I root for Bill Pullman

A 15 minute temple massage once a week would turn me into a completely different person