Todra Payne

When You Feel Alone, Try This Practice Loneliness can be hard to shake, as former U.S. surgeon general Vivek Murthy found. But there are little steps we can take each day to feel more connected.

When You Feel Alone, Try This Practice greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item...

Today, after 18 months, countless interviews, rewrites and setbacks, here we are. My book about women who found love "late" in life is finally for sale. 30 inspiring stories, 328 pages. Available on Amazon. 🎈🎉🎈
www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0FB...

What They Told Me About Love Interviewing women on finding their best relationships after 35

todrapayne.substack.com/p/what-they-...

I hate how everything is so politically charged and angry right now. I hate what's happening to America. Everyday I wake up to new sadness, and have to make hard choices about friends and networks and businesses I'll support (or not) and how I'll move in this new, awful reality.

I made a really hard decision a week ago. I cut someone's beautiful love story from the book I'm writing. We could not agree on one line-a political statement that also reflects my views, but I don't feel it belongs in a book about love. She is someone I like & admire and she's a major influencer. 💔

Okay. You have your opinion and I have mine. I've run out of steam for debating with a stranger. But enjoy your weekend and I hope the artists can be celebrated at the Oscars AND those who've lost their homes and possessions can be helped. Two things can hold space at the same time.

Suggesting it be postponed is fine. I even agree. It was the delivery. It suggests more. Even saying it's a "look at me party" says volumes and dismisses the recognition creatives deserve.

Oh, I definitely sense the disgust, despite the attempt at hiding it within a righteous cause.

Ah, more condescending remarks and vitriol towards storytellers and creatives. It's not an "ad" for films. The films have already happened. It's an acknowledgement of talent, art and hard creative work. And yes, for some people who appreciate it, it's necessary.

I think the idea of making it a fundraising event is wonderful.

This says to me you don't understand how Hollywood works. A-lost actors don't pay for any of that. They are lent clothes and jewelry for the evening by the designers.

That's not what the Oscars are, but okay. It's okay to celebrate art and talent. Why do people in 9-5 careers always make statements that sound like they're slightly jealous?

I feel so seen! 😆

I'm contacting the 30 women I interviewed for my book and reading the true love stories I wrote from their interviews. There are a lot of happy tears and excitement. I won't lie, It feels amazing. #writingcommunity

I love this.

Thanks! 😊

When I'm bored, I make scenes out of tiny handmade animals I find in thrift stores. Don't judge me.

Sounds like a good goal.

Merry Christmas!

Google showed me this memory today. My husband (then boyfriend) & I had just moved to LA & were celebrating our 1st Christmas in our new home city. A guy we'd recently met spent the day w/us & we all cooked together. He took this photo of me & my honey. We're still friends with him 11 yrs later.

This is my definition of a perfect morning.

Yes, a purse would work really well. Or maybe an oversized sweater.

I love consignment (and sometimes thrift) shopping for myself. I'd really have to know my friends would be open to receiving used items for Christmas. And since most thrift stores don't take things back after 7 days, there's the question of what happens if it doesn't fit.

Thank you. Your writing is lovely and impactful.

@saraeckel.bsky.social I'm in a coffee shop reading your substack and trying not to sob. "When I was younger, the future was a shiny castle I could never quite reach. Now the future is a distant tropical storm, gathering strength and heading to my village." I feel this in my soul. 😥

I won't know what that is. But I hope you had fun.

What did you see?

This ⬇️

I went into a clothing store and this guy tried to sell me jogging pants.

If you figure it out, please tell me.