Dumb Quotables

I realized waaaaay too late that I should have been a lot more careful with my phrasing when I asked my friend if he beat the hit indie game, Off.

We in the fighting game community largely care not for what is in your pants, only for your ability to throw a punch.

Am I still considered working class if I can't find work?

If seizing the means of production makes you a communist, what happens when you seize the memes instead? 🤔

A friend got me into Demon Slayer recently. I've been fighting the urge to ask them if Tanjiro can smell what The Rock is cooking.

Still thinking about a dating profile I saw. Girl said she liked to put all her playlists on shuffle and see what plays. She's polyjamorous like that. She wasn't just out of my league, she was out of my stratosphere.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. I miss 100% of the shots I do take. We are not the same.

I was asked how I can keep posting things without running into no thoughts head empty. The secret is I am always no thoughts head empty.

My friend told me he likes his women like he likes his coffee. He doesn't drink coffee. Not sure if gay or misogynistic.

Still thinking about that time my raid leader told me "Big tiddies are nice, but big tiddies aren't gonna help me clear savage". He has a girlfriend now and quit the game. We never did clear savage.

A girl asked me if I was pro therapy the other day. I told her I was really an amateur at best.

We're all just living on borrowed time now that Hatsune Miku has picked up a gun.

A friend was telling me that their binder was chafing one day. I spent a worryingly long time wondering why school supplies were making them uncomfortable.

People are always getting worked up over sexually transmitted diseases, but nobody ever wants to talk about platonically transmitted diseases.

You see professor. This case is much like a cookie. The chocolate chips represent the double homicide.

A reminder that Zangief from Street Fighter canonically wrestles bears to train his endurance. Twinks too sometimes.

My friend sent me a meme and said he's going to hell for laughing at it. I, as the good friend that I am, assured him that he's going to hell for a lot of reasons.

My friends know very well that I am always DTF. Down to Fight.

Regrettably, it has come to my knowledge that the existence of inflation porn implies the existence of deflation porn.

Your honor, my client did what we in the legal profession refer to as an "Ooopsie Woopsie". A bit of a, "Fucko Boingo" if you will.

Just be yourself is good advice until you learn you're mentally ill and have maladaptive coping mechanisms.

Confidence is just gaslighting yourself into optimism.