full frontal noodles
07.03.2026 20:27 — 👍 85 🔁 23 💬 10 📌 1full frontal noodles
07.03.2026 20:27 — 👍 85 🔁 23 💬 10 📌 1The thing is, apple pie is a bit sexy.
07.03.2026 23:18 — 👍 31 🔁 7 💬 9 📌 0I’m all cheese no cracker
07.03.2026 23:43 — 👍 8 🔁 3 💬 1 📌 0
you know, I've been thinking...
and i don't recommend it
“It’ll be fun!”
Lies, lies and more lies!!
Some of my best work is still pretty terrible.
06.03.2026 16:49 — 👍 36 🔁 20 💬 0 📌 0I'm in touch with my inner child just means I do a lot of dumb shit for my age
07.03.2026 01:35 — 👍 20 🔁 8 💬 1 📌 0So much progress, and still no bills that pay themselves
16.01.2026 13:03 — 👍 80 🔁 38 💬 1 📌 0
-What kind of cheese is this? It sure stinks..
-Be careful how you talk about my friends!
I hope that someday those Kraft singles find love.
06.03.2026 17:25 — 👍 298 🔁 80 💬 17 📌 8The gap in my resume is from being released into the wild.
06.03.2026 22:33 — 👍 149 🔁 63 💬 3 📌 0there are hot people and there are smart people, and then there's me and i eat a lot of bacon
06.03.2026 11:56 — 👍 25 🔁 5 💬 2 📌 0Have you ever noticed that some people are funnier when you drink and more lovable after they leave.
06.03.2026 13:18 — 👍 118 🔁 44 💬 2 📌 1Warning: objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
06.03.2026 08:19 — 👍 154 🔁 43 💬 4 📌 2I think we need more research on this topic. I volunteer as tribute 🙋🏻♀️
06.03.2026 13:14 — 👍 5 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0I don’t think it’s fair that we can’t be skinny and healthy by eating bacon every day
06.03.2026 12:57 — 👍 126 🔁 37 💬 4 📌 0If you're happy and you know it, ew
06.03.2026 04:33 — 👍 146 🔁 44 💬 1 📌 2
Ew, no.
*motions to everything*
😂😂 excellent
06.03.2026 02:18 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0After a long day, I just want to slip into a warm pair of garlic bread slippers.
06.03.2026 02:08 — 👍 25 🔁 6 💬 0 📌 1I want to see the charcuterie board before I get into the van.
05.03.2026 22:36 — 👍 141 🔁 44 💬 4 📌 0Still waiting on a motherfucker to tell me how to get to Sesame Street.
06.03.2026 00:45 — 👍 104 🔁 44 💬 2 📌 0Triscuits + cheese = dinner
06.03.2026 01:25 — 👍 10 🔁 3 💬 2 📌 0could be a nothing burger...but it could also be an everything bagel
05.03.2026 18:48 — 👍 1579 🔁 369 💬 44 📌 9We don’t agree on much, but I think we can all agree with the way Johnny Cash sang ooooooo in Ring of Fire
05.03.2026 15:55 — 👍 92 🔁 32 💬 3 📌 0I want to stay home and talk to my dog about squirrels
05.03.2026 13:55 — 👍 126 🔁 49 💬 3 📌 1I bet if I changed my pfp, I could hang out here incognito for a week
05.03.2026 13:14 — 👍 18 🔁 4 💬 4 📌 0please accept my sincerest oopsie daises
05.03.2026 14:13 — 👍 140 🔁 68 💬 1 📌 0You come into my house and expect me to be wearing pants?! The nerve.
05.03.2026 15:43 — 👍 51 🔁 18 💬 2 📌 0