Dan Clyne

The period really brings some gravity to it

You really need to try harder at this

“Hi im Craig Ferguson welcome to Jackass”

Just kidding could you imagine

I did 5 here. Tried to do a modern day Steven Wright thing. Went okay. Bad Bunny gave me a hat

They have to host because Jamie Kennedy pulled out last minute

The Boston Celtics have waived Jayson Tatum

I want to see a fast food CEO do the burger war thing but where he just stares into the camera and shoves a whole burger directly up his ass

I was recently at a memorial service and now I’m kicking myself for not mentioning how I knew a 2nd Trump term would be bad

Other than the "Car Era" episode this is really cool. You don't need to skip that ep, I just don't think dinosaurs had cars and it's fishy that the Subaru logo keeps appearing in natural formations

Might just be the coffee mug brand

The president assured me there’d be no other Special Envoys for The Shield of the Americas when he gave me the position. I’m not sharing a fucking desk.

She got shit-canned and still has to go to work?

Mark my words. There will be at least one Boston media person genuinely mad he's ineligible for MVP voting

Possibly but this could present an ethics conundrum when working with whiskey sponsors

Wanted to make the announcement on Oscar day but you can’t keep anything under wraps in this industry anymore. Let’s make it official. My next project: Dokoupil

Oh wow. Chappell has been sending out clues this whole time

Super underrated OC bit is the "news" posts showing a full paragraph preview before prompting you to log in, then when you do the rest of it is like, one additional sentence

Stephen A Smith is in a prolonged public feud with an NBA team’s social media manager

I'm glad they did this publicly. Tickets were pricy but it was still cool to see live

This is what 2 months of Debra Messing off the streets looks like

I saw Bruce with an ex-gf and her mom in Chicago and I swear in the middle of the show he straight up put Chris Duhon on skates and then just calmly sat back down to play Mandolin Rain like nothing happened

X dot com is a cesspool and I can’t think of a single reason to still be on it other than the Burt Reynolds thing. Trust me, outside of still being able to interact with Burt Reynolds, whose sentient consciousness was uploaded to the site in a lightning storm, you won’t miss a single thing. Leave it

Yeah I can clone your dog. What kind was it? Ok yeah just send me some of its shit or fur or something. It’s $50K btw

(goes to the German Shepherd store)

Rich people are unbelievably naive and usually own purebred dogs. I still firmly believe this is a very simple con

They've digitally added Pete Davidson to every episode for some reason

Jim Carrey is the first celebrity in history to have work done on his face

It can be tough when you don’t quite understand a post but you’re personally obligated to reply to every post you see

I think I have to go with Sentimental Value for Best Picture because to my knowledge it’s the only film that touches on the concept of gifting a DVD copy of Irreversible to a child on his birthday

Using a crane rig to pull back and reveal END CHEMTRAILS NOW spelled out in geraniums in my prize-winning garden