eve aspinall

he looks like he’s just caught his dick in a door

that’s about £1.87 btw

wow i can’t believe the Christopher Nolan Odyssey adaptation was made just for me and me alone

I got it on my phone a couple of weeks ago and genuinely feel like my relationship might have suffered for it

going to run around the streets beaming and wishing people a merry christmas so they think i’ve had a supernatural adventure overnight

do people devil other things or just eggs

didn’t get into berghain because they told me i’m too good looking

haven’t watched wicked yet. saving it for when i’m on a plane in 6 months time

brian blessed (early 1960s) / handsome shrek (2004)

Witness the beginning of a #DarkUniverse.

i see people are making starter packs filled with very famous people/brands and then slipping themselves in to get more followers. absolutely class trickery there. wish i’d thought of it first

can i just say my conspiratorial and superstitious thinking actually worked here and i did in fact get glastonbury tickets

I’m not conspiratorial or superstitious until it comes to trying for Glastonbury tickets and then I become absolutely insane

👀👀👀👀

when i meet someone else with my name it’s like when dogs see each other across the road

going to make a delicious carbonara out of everyone’s removed buccal fat

yesterday a teenager said to me “i love your frazzled english woman aesthetic”. these are things we’re just saying to people?????

I don’t know what to tweet for my first bluesky tweet. My first twitter tweet was in 2008 and simply said “is having a berocca :D.