Seraph

I'm not wholly convinced that I've got a coherent collection worth organising, yet. We'll see.

🫂💜 to you all.

I had to cycle home, so that helped and I'm winding down now with some TV, toast and a CBD drink. I'll be okay, thanks. I just wish I could have had a completely different day on the other side of it. 💜

Well, conversation had and like everything that makes me so anxious I want to cry and am scared to move, it was nothing to worry about. I wish that information helped, ever.

Anyway, I'm calmer now. Hopefully the adrenaline and cortisol will all be gone by the morning.

I'm tempted by II, but I've barely played 1 and wonder if I'll ultimately do the same again.

I miss Dead Space, but I can't play it on my own.

12 days left!

Did I mention I'm in this?

My short story 'A Robot's Purpose' is exclusive to The Anthropocene Epic! 🤖

Writing, mainly short poetry these days, but still creating something.

We could start a club for gays that want to be other gays.

Only I guess the membership numbers would be a bit high.

Oh I have nothing against Pokémon gays at all... I'm just envious that I can't really be one owing to my lack of joy in playing any Pokémon game ever. 😭

But yeah, the other gays you mention need to rethink their lives.

There's a thing*

They'd a think I should be doing at some point. Good luck with the editing!

Everything I've seen about it has made me conclude that it's a Pokémon game that I might actually enjoy. I could be Pokémon gay for 5 minutes. 😅

You're not helping me resist a Switch 2 purchase, Adam! 😠😝💜

Tales of the Shire is a very relaxing game. It's effects don't last long, however.

There. That's the recycling put out. And I have retreated once more.

Okay, but Jim has made my day a little better. 😻💜

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

I prefer when that's a reaction to one of your photos, really. Strange how the sound is essentially the same.

Look at me, I'm your body trying to protect you from this largely non-existent social threat! I'm so powerful I can make you want to do nothing but flop in bed where you're "safe" but I can't face a difficult conversation the possibility of which activates a bunch of old memories.

Yeah. Go you!

Briefly tried getting angry with this anxiety, because it's limited my day so much, and for a moment it helped, but I couldn't really sustain it. There are things I really should do this afternoon, however, so I'm jist gonna see take it slow and keep calming music in my ears.

This is all so stupid.

Finally, I move.

(I need to get something for dinner from Sainsbury's).

I read for a bit and had a good nap but now I'm awake again and feeling like I ought to move and do things and really not wanting to. I feel borderline okay in this little duvet cocoon.

It's something to be reminded how much anxiety can still affect me, even though I feel like I've left my GAD days behind me. This might always be a part of me, though, and it's good to remember that and to be kind.

So I read all of those things in your posts as you and have no concern about any of it. It comes across as warm, friendly, genuine.

But also, I worry about this sort of thing all the time, even with pepper it shouldn't be an issue with, like my boyfriend (and I'm tentative using that!) so I relate.

College was a good distraction this morning. Have the afternoon off and should probably have come to library to do more work but as soon as the group supervision thing was over my anxiety came rushing back so I'm now home, eating toast, listening to brain.FM's de-stress mode and preparing for a nap.

Woke up this morning to an email from my daughter's teacher. It was nice and thoughtful, but had still left me feeling extremely anxious about what her mother might say to me this evening.

I'm terrified of being the bad parent and terrified of having difficult conversations. 😰

🎵 We declared Charlie Puth should be a*more ethical* artist. 🎵

I managed to go to the library after a long dull day in work and I actually finished and handed in an assignment! It was technically due in *December*, but still.

Dungeon Crawler Carl hardbacks 1-6 with the UK divers which are all pleasingly designed with bright neon colours on a black background.

Also the hardcover versions we get over here are so nice to look at!

I've only read the first book, but I picked up 2 and 3 with Christmas money cos I loved it so much... Unfortunately I'm also in the middle of a bunch of other series so it got deprioritised, but I'll continue it soon!

Surprise leading the day too, owing to sickness. Does that make me the chairman?