Biggie Smells

Everyone likes to drag grandpa Joe for suddenly getting up after being in bed for twenty years, but it’s also highly possible that it was just terminal lucidity.

105 oz to freedom

In 1989 Bill and Ted were like “music will change the world. A song will make us all lay down our clubs” and in 2025 a video of a little girl singing a Disney song on a flight made us punch our phones like it was made of spiders.

Sheena is a Fartknocker

One of the greatest mental tools I’ve developed is the ability to think about buying something for 300 dollars and then being absolutely sure I’ve saved 100 dollars if I buy something for 200 instead.

Spotify’s AI DJ thing was pretty decent there for a minute or two, but holy shit it’s gotten bad. I replayed nirvana’s cover of love buzz one time and now any time I try the thing it’s “aw yeah now here’s a mix of your favorite song.”

Ideally this leads to a “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story” style biopic with a heavily matted Michael Cera as Richard Reid.

Which I guess some people in the military sort of end up doing anyway but in my version you don’t have a gun and you just exist among other human beings.

I’m going to think of this post every time I toy with the idea of uninstalling Next Door.

what so our bones are just always wet

Way too much changing lately. This was my second ACNH Island, and the one I had the longest. Three years in, it’s time to let it go for the best reason. The kiddo wants her own island from scratch and who am I to say no? See ya on the flip, Ken.

It isn’t at all what was said in the 30 second message from the dog groomer but I’m still gonna say “useful.”

This was supposed to be a “best of” Dreamcast ROM pack. Does anyone know where I can find the right one?