Ian Thompson

‘Roids.

A small book with limbs made of rolled-up paper held between the covers and a crudely drawn face sticking out from the top

I don't have kids so I dressed up my book as a child for world book day

The following VAR check is brought to you by Charlestone Chew and Nordyne Defense Dynamics.

A photo of entertainers Little and Large. Large’s face has been blanked out and a question mark placed over it.

this photo leaves little to the imagination

Keep seeing this Copilot ad in which a woman pulls off a shit-hot 'business negotiation' by tapping away at Copilot to ask its advice every 20 seconds, as if that would put you in a position of strength rather than implying that you didn't have a fucking clue what you were doing.

I'm convinced AI is our generation's radium - a discovery with genuinely useful applications in specific, controlled circumstances that we stupidly put in everything from kid's toys to toothpaste until we realised the harm far too late where future generations will ask if we were out of our minds.

*looking at the Mona Lisa* there is no way a turtle painted this

IF I didn't know what an egg was and someone told me it comes out of a chicken's arse and it's in a shell with a liquid inside containing a clear bit and a yellow bit, but when you cook it it goes hard and you can eat it, and then they asked me to try it, I think I'd tell them to fuck right off. Gav H, Hebden Bridge

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz353bs

Why doesn’t the sign sink?

Or perhaps be accompanied by a picture of a bull’s arsehole?

Does he have slides it?

okay hear me out

The chap on the bike is incredibly talented.

This sounds like it's part of a Two Ronnies sketch

"Food truck selling steaming hot sandwiches full of shite could fail unless people start willingly buying steaming hot sandwiches full of shite."

Managed to say all that in the second it would take between getting his toes stuck and smashing his stupid face into the road.

“Nice Scottish links course you’ve got there, Mr President. It’d be a shame if someone built a wind farm there”

Trump nimmt eine Siegertrophäe von einer Tennisspielerin an. Text dazu: "Orange Mussolini latest vanity prize. Trump wins Wimbledon Women's Single tennis championship. Trump heaped praise on Serena Williams for handing over to him her 216 trophy prize for "the best tennis Trump has done"

Omg Eunice Huthart just gave her Gladiators title to the deserving winner Donald Trump 🥹🥹🥹

Say what you will about Sauron but…

John Hurt enjoying a meal in the film Alien

NASA say that the crew member who was ill and returned to earth is doing well and now having a meal with colleagues.

It’s disguise was pretty convincing but it couldn’t do the accent.

I must have missed that reboot of Columbo.

Did the Captain of the Demeter send that?

Look, it makes strategic sense; if Venezuela has huge reserves of teenage Latin American beauty pageant contestants, then access needs to be secured to that supply, if necessary using military force.

It sounds like comically specific hyperbole but it is verifiably true that in the same year Elon Musk predicted fully autonomous taxis serving half the nation, what actually happened was his chatbot became a pedophile

Mogwai

Fuck it I don’t care anymore

Aargh. Think it but don’t say it out loud man…

I have just stapled my eyes shut to avoid seeing that image ever again.