Travis Souders

First time I saw The Apprentice, I thought, "Hopefully someday I will be informed of this man's every bruise or skin condition."

I know John Dowd when I see him

Don DeLillo's Funniest Novel Is A 1980 Hockey Sex Romp He Won't Acknowledge | Defector The end of the 1970s seemed to be a moment of uncertainty for Don DeLillo, creatively speaking. The previous decade had seen him become a rather important American author, enough so that he had left h...

Fantastic blog here. defector.com/don-delillo-...

Ya I got an American deal

I left my luggage unattended for 2, almost 3 minutes while I paid $48 for a chicken sandwich and an Amstel Light. I’m finally free

If you're at the airport and Kristi Noem is doing the ominous little message from the TSA screens, you no longer have to do anything she says. Leave your laptop in the case, whatever.

She looks like the Team America puppet version of herself

OpenAI and…the United States Military…are teaming up to notify YOU that your son has been KILLED IN ACTION. Click here to speak with your son via AI one last time

The Bills have flipped DJ Moore to the Colorado Avalanche for eight conditional 7th-round picks

Starter brand in 1994:

Dudes will see this and be like “hell yeah”

Nobody is safe from the Ro/Ozempic trend

Jauan Jennings would be such a dawg for them. Fierce blocker, great contested catch guy, doesn’t need volume to make an impact, and they have the speed elsewhere at WR

This is like my uncle Vick, who used to always preface a bunch of bullshit with “now this ain’t no bullshit”

*Cameron Latu’d*

The Kiefer Sherwood deal is one of those ones that somehow never felt inevitable until it happened

Macklin Celebrini plays for the team I like. What a world

I stand corrected and now I see that it is indeed the proper jelly

What athlete's expression will stay with you for the rest of your life?

Needs strawberry jelly and crunchy peanut butter—the superior varietals—but yes, this would go hard

He’s SUCH a Titan

“They’re good! I like the zoomer snack!”

It’s actually FEWER Misérables

He looks like he’s been pickled

Sometimes you get stoned and pet your dog’s velvet ears for a bit. And what of it

Dynasty was created for this exact reason. Your home leagues know about Jordan James already. Oh you have a sleeper? Too bad I pre-drafted him in 2014, buddy

Oh man, nothing better. Congrats!

Every day when I get home, I say, “I’ll be right back, I gotta change—just my clothes, not my personality.” My family hates it

Unfortunately this is jail for you

You weren’t ever going to skip Jahmyr Gibbs in the first because David Montgomery was there. Stahp overreacting