agata

luigi mangione's eyebrows and eyelashes

ROTFLMAO. this is some sort of self-sabotage culture. guys out there shaving off their brows and lashes and meanwhile the hottie of the year is all eyebrows and lashes:

so i wonder whether this all could've been resolved if only luigi had someone to talk to with sufficient curiosity about and knowledge of japan...

so like... maybe the cops didn't understand the urgency. or, conversely, they understood, notified the actually responsible parties, and then didn't see any need to rush anywhere themselves because that's not their job as i said.

the thing is... i somewhat suspect that the stress and trauma from what he witnessed with the elderly guy might've been completely avoidable. this *might* have been a cultural misunderstanding, as it's not really the police's job to respond to medical emergencies.

i would open an onlyfans just to have enough money to pay for luigi's onlyfans

space. he and elon should both get on a rocket to mars, and miss, and just be lost in the depths of space

"one of the most hated guys in the country"

hahahahahaha.

"most hated" guys don't get bombarded with love letters. they get bombarded with hatemail

to be fair, the only cops not known for false statements or planting evidence are the ones who haven't been caught yet. BUT it definitely helps the defense that these ones ARE already known for this

the way it got entirely too hot in the room when i read this:

'He wanted to be watched. He got off on it. There are at least 20 videos of him having sex.'

the daily mail is a tabloid that lives off smearing people, so it's more likely that this is BS than that it's true.

and also, as a story meant to make him less appealing to his fans, THIS isn't going to do it lol.

The NYPD seized a shipment of ‘Most Wanted CEO’ playing cards en route from manufacturer to the creator to ship out to customers.

The NYPD is currently led by Jessica Tisch, who comes from one of the country’s wealthiest families & took particularly intense issue with the cards.

REF: FROM: TO: SUBJECT: MEMORANDUM EXECUTIVE ORDER 14168 Department of Justice ALL PERSONNEL Bathroom Usage All humans are female at conception as sex differentiation takes place around 6-7 weeks. Pursuant to the executive order 14168 "Defending Women from Gender Ideology Extremism and Restoring Biological Truth to the Federal Government" no one is allowed to use this men's room. ANYONE CAUGHT ENTERING WILL BE REPORTED TO DEIATRUTH@OPM.GOV

Just some amazing signs up in a congressional office building. Whoever did this… hero(es).

“Accused CEO killer” is the biggest of green flags

Y’know whats honestly nice abt this. We can make as many jokes abt thirsty folks as we want but he used his statement to say “stop giving your jubblies & personal info to the cops. Who knows what’ll happen to it in their hands”

and hes right. That stuff is being screened but ask what becomes of it

oo tongue

he would, too. actually imagine what having him there and also sharing his commissary money would actually do to highlight the atrocious fucking conditions there.

not gonna lie, dude's own personal dress style is horrible. once he's free he needs some queer-eye-for-the-straight-guy guides. I'm volunteering, of course.

OMG he writes back?! *faints*

the tentacle porn was only a matter of time

I'm developing new kinks every time they try to make him look bad.

everyone, take note: you're allowed to say "delay, deny, depose" to the people denying you or your children life-saving healthcare

the account I was responding to has been deactivated

I'll take that as a "No"

Airport shuttles from MSP are funny anyway. It's possible to get one from that airport to a whole bunch of other airports, but not from THOSE airports to anywhere in their own cities.

Who even needs to travel between airports via bus?

Hello? I would like to take you up on your bet to find an airport shuttle from ANY US airport, for $5, to a private address. I have a list.

*taps microphone*

Hello? Anyone there?

oh I'm taking that bet. how much are you offering.