Marc

I should be by a pool with my tits out, not getting up to get ready for work. This pace is a prison.

🤷🏾‍♂️🤣

Thanks! 🤣🤣

so with google’s willow how is bitcoin mining still a thing

I’m genuinely surprised by how nice I am

How I arrived on Bluesky.

Sorry I didn’t mean to give a pep talk, that’s not my character

•showing pictures of me in the 90s•

them: is that you?

me: in the fresh

I am officially no longer down with the sickness

ELECTION INTEGRITY:

Republicans worry about who votes

Democrats worry about who counts the votes

Good morning ☕️

Sometimes the words just flow naturally and other times we can't seem to find them. Both are okay. Just take time to breathe.

"What that mouth do?"

Cut you down to size.

I’m going to a perimenopause clinic next month and really hoping a frontal lobotomy is on the menu, because I’m certain that’s the only thing that’ll fix me now.

I never fucking cared if other people found my life fucking interesting as long as I was fucking interested in it

If you’re going to look at me with that tone of voice at least you could be naked.

a man in a blue shirt and black tie talking on a telephone with the words coffee very black below him Alt: a man in a blue shirt and black tie talking on a telephone with the words coffee very black below him. James Bond

☕ c h e e r s

Look Canada, I’m not looking to apply for citizenship yet but let the record show I have never listened to a Gordon Lightfoot song without openly weeping

This is a photo of the chickens at breakfast. It's not even all of the chickens; if you look closely, you can see more pouring out of the barn. I miss our little flock at home. Something tried to get them last night and it looks like it was probably the ermine although I'm not a professional tracker. Fortunately, it only managed to knock a bunch of shit over in the barn outside their enclosure.

#notmyflock

I will never not miss John Candy.

Off to the mines!

I mean, hi ho, hi ho?

Off to the mines!

OMFG STFU Hegseth! 😬

I’m not great with idioms but I know one thing:

If wishes were fishes, snitches would get stitches.

To fuck with coworkers I take a handful of rabbit droppings to work every day to drop in the toilet bowl and then leave it unflushed.

Are all those superlatives compensating for something, bro?

No, I will not pull your finger grandma. I’m not falling for that trick again

The best way to avoid an expensive divorce is by not getting married in the first place.

Tune in tomorrow for another secret the Illuminati don’t want you to know.

I bet nature regrets giving us opposable thumbs.

Spring sunlight… coming soon to a window near you.

Might fuck around and take things too far, anyone want to come?