John Glomar of The Mineshaft Gap

It’s time I came clean: I was the 160th SOAR ninja

I hate to hand it to the goobers but Cryes with Vans lowkey looks cool

I have the solid snake mullet now. Consider this a warning.

I’m pretty sure that if you don’t like Sabrina Carpenter you’re dead inside. Pack it up. It’s over for you.

IT’S COMING HOOMMEEE

Who is getting hooters delivered. The wings are good but they’re not exactly the main attraction

YouTube video by Carlino Macho Man Randy Savage's greatest quote

Macho Man now and forever the gold standard of positive masculinity dig it.

youtu.be/wz-VJl7UkB8?...

If God wanted the nazis to win, he wouldn't have made them so flammable.

ESPN college gameday

Nicotine. Next question.

I get it now they’re for cans of Zyn

The Velcro on Crye shirts is spaced too far apart to hold the new patch as securely as I’d like I think it’s time to raid mod a BDU shirt like it’s 2005

Big Birdshot

This part is called The Line and it’ll have the most efficient rail network in existence

Okay seriously what are the little ankle pockets on Cryes for. What are you guys putting down there

Happy Trinity Day to all those who observe

Deep down, this is the central thesis of American strategic thinking

You know what? I blame the CTBT. There is something within the psyche of the American strategic system that feels a need to blow up a desert every now and then. It used to be that this urge was vented through nuclear testing, but since ‘92 the only way to get a fix is to launch TLAMs at bits of MENA

When I’m democratically elected ruler for life, CENTCOM will be a retirement home for elderly staff officers and their sole function will be to blow up patches of desert somewhere out in Nevada

I’m going to start biting

If you interrupt my TouchTunes queue with a song that drastically alters the vibe what happens next should be considered self defence

Call me animal control the way I’m putting these dogs down

3 deep at a minor league game, ripped off a gummy, absolute rockets sat in the next row, god bless America

What if nobody was president

27-year-old gorilla Cecil leaving Louisville to become troop leader at San Francisco Zoo - Local News Matters THE LOUISVILLE ZOO AND the San Francisco Zoo & Gardens announced that Cecil, a 27-year-old male western lowland gorilla, will be relocated to

Pretty cool that you can not only transfer gorillas between units but assign them a different rank and position at their new duty station localnewsmatters.org/2025/07/06/2...

Poastmaster General

Means a lot coming from the master

These might be the best sentences I’ve ever written

Big sticks in the Middle East Or: why nothing ever happens, despite all the things that happen.

I wrote and published this while walking around a Walmart
open.substack.com/pub/themines...