Jake Wright

Heartbreaking: The worst person you know just made a great point

I'm cheering on Marjorie Taylor Greene! What is happening?!

MTG welcome to the resistance, I guess…

"Yes, I took a hundred bucks from the register but payday was tomorrow, so it's technically not stealing."

–Alan Dershowitz, probably

Chat, is it bad if you're the defendant and the judge's order starts out like this?

I. INTRODUCTION

Plaintiffs have submitted overwhelming evidence.

I'm pretty sure I was just at this factory. It was called New Zealand.

"for $9.99/mo…"

[swipes card]

ELDRITCH VOICE: The pact is sealed.

I'm trying to find a Chicago Bears hoodie for my wife and there are so many options that I've reached semantic satiation on the word BEARS.

Montessori. I've been shocked at how the best version of Montessori and the best version of student-driven active learning in higher ed are basically the same thing.*

*Montessori students get recess, which I want.

@aacu.org SURVEY: Why did you answer the way you did about Generative AI use in your courses?

ME: Because generative AI is morally repugnant.

Also in my experience, “drop off from hell” usually means they’re absolute angels at daycare, so you won’t have to worry about the teacher talking to you later.

The other night, I spent an unplanned 30 minutes with my 8YO talking about how to translate the first word of Beowulf (“hwæt”) and why there’s a scholarly debate about it because we were reading a graphic novel adaptation for kids, Bea Wolf, that translates it as “Hey, wait!” Brilliant curiosity!

Obviously horrific, but Kevin’s idea ain’t a bad one…

"In my own hubris, I burned down the University of West Virginia. The real problem is arrogant faculty."

–By E. Gordon Gee

All of his ignorance and awfulness and shithousery aside, can we take a moment to appreciate the fact that a man who once got in trouble for taking out a billboard to dunk on a bunch of impoverished nuns thinks that higher ed has gotten “too arrogant”?

I want you to think about how COMPLETELY WILD the lights were to make them visible in DOWNTOWN MINNEAPOLIS. Yes, I know it's a super long exposure shot, but still. This is absurd.

Give it a year and I'll pick the whole thing up on Game Pass.

If he gives Diggs the Three Amigos, is that one penalty or three?

Shohei. Yes, that was my name. Shohei the Red. *I* am Shohei the Blue. And I come back to you at the turn of the tide.

When Ohtani won?

Gatsby is a celebration of wealth and the American Upper Class.

👆👆This guy tenures☝️☝️

a cartoon character named goku is standing in a field Alt: Goku goes Super Saiyan in a bright flash of light.

ME: My international conference presentation means I haven’t been able to really help plan my kid’s birthday party like I usually do. I feel bad.

FATE: The venue has cocked things up to the point it’s suddenly not clear if this party will happen 48 hours before it’s supposed to take place.

ME:

Just gonna file that one away under "Do not read while eating."

DOES THIS MEAN SPECIAL MLS WINTER BALL IN COOL COLORS?!

It really seems to be the pedo version of "We have just created the suffering engine discussed in the literary classic, 'Please, God, do not create the suffering engine whatever you do'."

As I pointed out elsewhere, this would mean that a COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY BELIEVABLE nine percent of the US population is undocumented.

FUN FACT: Furiously saying "I'm the one calling because I'm the CALM one" when you get told your kid's birthday party has been totally upended in a completely preventable way seems to get wheels in motion.

Vance is saying that NINE PERCENT of the US population is undocumented. That doesn't pass the smell test from the next room when said room is full of dirty diapers.