Big Malamood

Im on day 5/12 of saving my cum for when my owner arrives.

I'm already fucking feral I don't know how I'm going to make it another week.

Sometimes I just stare at myself throbbing and repeat the mantra:

I'm a good Dog.
I'm a good Dog.
I'm a good Dog.

I'm gonna die. See you at my funeral boys.

A mayo is just half a ranch <3

This but you're in a half squat over my face with no undies on

Hey I don't know you, but I'm really glad you're still here.

ITS A SLIPPERY SLOPE FELLAS

Me at 13: I dunno man, pretending to be a dog on the internet seems pretty weird, but these people are really nice and they accept me so I guess I'll stick around.

20 years later: *Biohacking through cum supplement stacking, doing cardio and planking so I can optimize impregnating my boyfriend*

It's Yeshu Coconut drink. It's more or less coconut milk with sodium caseinate (a protein found in milk) added. Makes a killer piña colada.

What kind of beverage do you guys think this is? Wrong answers only.

Hey we're all allowed to have a Britney moment once in a while.

I contain multitudes babe 💅

You can't defeat me if I'm on your team

I'm honoured that I'm one of the few people that's able to dish this right back to you :P

Moot's Jukebox Moothany Mootano here, the internet's busiest music dog.

If anyone if looking for some new tunes, I have been posting on this music channel for several years.

Playlists are pinned to the top and done annually.

Enjoy!

t.me/mootbox

Its a tough cut with a lot of connective tissue so you want strong flavours and long cook times. I've done a Cantonese style braise (Shaoxing wine, five spice, soy, rock sugar) on it before with good success. Its also excellent braised and shredded like carnitas for tacos.

Whoah! That's a good dog!

Update: There was time for pussy when we got home.

Legendary stroke game

One weekend with @coachcrow.bsky.social and I look like I stayed in an Azerbaijani prison

I'm constantly under the influence (of drugs)

Ugh.

I am so hopelessly in love with this man.

I wanna make him coffee in the morning and watch him sleep.

I wanna hold his hand in public and go on picnics.

I feel like I'm living in a fucking Disney Channel Original Movie.

Luke Weyman if you're reading this your Dad's a party bottom.

I met up with a bear on Craigslist and realized in the middle of fucking him that he was my highschool bully's dad (his grad photo was on the mantle). I have prayed for the day where I run into him again so I can tell him this but it's never come.

Buddy you can't be illustrating my mental illness in 4k like this.

Perfect sear on that steak.

My Gen Z colleagues always think Im mad at them if I do this. You can fix this by adding an exclamation point once in a while

"Please let me know if you need any help with this review."

= Moot fucking hates me

"Please let me know if you need any help with this review!"

= Moot is offering help

YouTube video by Kusorare - Topic God's Cock

🎶DON'T PULL UP WITH 16 MEN TO CLAP ON OUR CHEEKS🎶

youtu.be/9W626BFMVXs?...

Yes but then I cry and punch a hole in the wall when post-nut clarity hits.

My owner is so unreasonably attractive.

Every time he sends me nudes my dick goes through the 5 stages of grief.

If you invite me over I will eat them

Half my telegram contacts are in this thread and I feel exposed.