Narugod

a black and white drawing of a girl with a flower in her hair covering her mouth . ALT: a black and white drawing of a girl with a flower in her hair covering her mouth .

*me dozing off in class*

Teacher: NARUGOD! Since you know everything.. answer this question on the board.

Kawaii girl: psst.. the answer is aura..

Me: *speaks up* the answer is.. aura..

*Whole class laughs*

K̵a̵w̵a̵i̵i̵ Bully girl:
Baaka.. you fell for that..? Pathetic.

a girl with blonde hair and a ponytail making a funny face ALT: a girl with blonde hair and a ponytail making a funny face

*smoking weed with friend*
Me: This hidden leaf.. is so sugoi... *Passes it over*

Friend: Yeah man.. *hits it*

Me: *gets flustered* T-t-this is.. like an indirect kiss.. KYAAAAAAH!!! I-its not like I like you anything.. BAKA!!

Pick your weeb bf!

Nonchalant: You wanna date me..? *sighs* What a drag..

Golden retriever: Y-you want to date.. lil ol' me..? YOSHAAAAA!!

Harlot: You can be another one added to the harem..

Catboy: You want to date me-nya? *starts purring*

a close up of a person 's face with a red jacket and tie ALT: a close up of a person 's face with a red jacket and tie

"I want a weeb bf"
Until we're too busy binging anime

"I want a weeb bf"
Until you have to share with the waifu harem

"I want a weeb bf"
Until you see our rage when normies call anime cartoons

If you can handle all that, we'll treat you better than any side character ever would

*teacher hands out report cards*

"Alright class, remember to get them signed by your parents and bring them back tomorrow!"

*me looking out window aurafully*
"Parents..? Heh. What's that..?"

*all my classmates start screaming*
"Omg.. he's so mysterious 🥺"
"He's so hurt.. 🥺"

2 sentence horror

*robber breaks into my house*
"HANDS UP!!"

*me shaking*
"Y-you can take anything!! Please don't hurt me!!"

*He glances at my manga collection and messily throws them in his bag*

*I drop down to my knees*
"I.. said you can take anything.. Not my everything.."

a girl in a santa hat is holding a bell with the words merry christmas written on it ALT: a girl in a santa hat is holding a bell with the words merry christmas written on it

Oh, the normies outside are spiteful
But our anime, it's so delightful
And since we love Japan so,
Let's put on the show! On the show! On the show!

Our love of Japan is never stopping
All these cartoons are flopping
Anime, it truly glows
Put on the show! On the show! On the show

a man in a suit and tie is laying on a bed with another man ALT: a man in a suit and tie is laying on a bed with another man

Are you a weeb doing hentai irl for the first time? Here's what to say!

"You are so sugoi.."
"I'm about to bust.. say itadakimasu.."
"Just like that.. I'm getting neg diffed.."
"Good waifu."
"Faster..? Prepare to get speedblitzed"

How the hell am I supposed to enjoy going to a party with ignorant bakas like this.

Instead of playing western normie games like spin the bottle or Jenga.. I'd rather play the Japanese Mahjong or Shogi.. Heh, who am I kidding *sneers* they probably don't even know how to play

Asking for a friend, what would you do if, hypothetically, you were getting chased by Japanese officials to get deported because I'm "overstaying my visa"

Keep in mind this totally fictional person is spiritually Japanese so they're basically a citizen and this is unjust.

a man with a mustache wearing a maid outfit ALT: a man with a mustache wearing a maid outfit

just signed up to become a maid so I can wear the official anime costume! THIS IS GONNA BE SO KAWAII!! No idea how to clean but who cares DATTEBAYO!

But I'll actually have a second side to me and in reality I'm a bad ass battle maid. "Leave master alone." KYAAAAHH!! SO BADASS!

a close up of a cartoon character 's face with glowing eyes and teeth ALT: a close up of a cartoon character 's face with glowing eyes and teeth

For now on I'm done holding back against these animephobes.

I'm not just being a fake tough guy. I've had people nervously laugh in my face because of my overwhelming malice.

I lived in a gated community not to protect me from the outside.. but to protect the outside from me.

a cartoon character with white hair and a pink shirt is standing in front of a green board ALT: a cartoon character with white hair and a pink shirt is standing in front of a green board

Why do normies say "why would you watch anime it isn't in English"

God forbid you don't get spoonfed with the dialogue.

I watched an anime with no subtitles at all and I could only understand by hearing words like "sugoi" and the plot was still fantastic.

a close up of a cartoon character 's face with red hair and white eyes ALT: a close up of a cartoon character 's face with red hair and white eyes

Finally.. I'm in the dream land.. JAPAN!!

This country it's.. so beautiful I.. I can't.. it's everything I thought of it and more..

My visa says I can only stay for 10 days but.. DAMN THE RULES!!! IM STAYING HERE FOREVER!! THIS IS MY TRUE HOME! IM A TRUE JAPANESE CITIZEN NOW!!

a black and white drawing of a man wearing headphones ALT: a black and white drawing of a man wearing headphones

Being an anime fan is way harder than a 9-5

All I get told is "Get a job" "Stink level over 9000" by normies who don't realize how animephobic jobs are

I'm discriminated against everyday and I take it with a smile.. because I know one day I'll be in the promised land.. JAPAN!

I've had time to reflect and I've realized.. he was a fraud.

He got speed blitzed by a car in base form (200 horsepower 2008 Honda Accord)

The car is not even wall level I think my friend was mob level fodder..

I think his death was there to give me a powerup

Am I the asshole

Recently my friend got isekaied (low diffed by car) and I went to his funeral

When I went to view the body I said "damn baka.. I told you.. IF YOU DIE I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF!" and started punching his body

Apparently this is "disrespectful" and I got thrown out

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I think colleges need to introduce a new course called animeology. It would cover anime and all things Japan.

We wouldn't have to learn Western normie trash and finally learn about what really matters

And no it wouldn't give you a job but the degree means much more than that

a close up of a person 's face with glowing eyes ALT: a close up of a person 's face with glowing eyes

I'm majoring in psychology.. not because I want to become a therapist and talk about feelings..

It's so I can better learn to manipulate people and have them dancing in the palm of my hand.

Ayanokoji. thank you. Thank you for showing me towards true enlightenment.

Not that I would ever want to do that!! Ha! P-preposterous!! I have a BEAUTIFUL WAIFU IN HINATA!!

They made 3 mistakes.
1. Interrupting my manga time
2. Not using any honorifics
3. Thinking I would dare get sponsored by anything other than Japanese

Tch.. no respect whatsoever. Next time any company pulls something like that..

I won't have any mercy.

Hubba hub- DAMN IT DAMN IT SNAP OUT OF IT!!! THATS A FRIEND.. but I want to be something mo-.. Tch.. he has a wife anyways *sighs*

Did I say something wrong?? He hasn't spoken to me in days? Does he just hate anime? If so that's messed up.

THIS PLACE IS NOT BAD!! NOT BAD AT ALL!!

This is my official account on this app