Noelle

Because of the deep state plot to infect their air with oxygen

...maybe slow banjo music

Hey, maybe this will help speed up the apocalypse 🤞🏼🤞🏼

Dam been writing a book about this and she just TikToked it in 90 seconds.

Zombie Dan shambles around assaulting people with horrific wordplay.

I plan on taking G. Want to carpool?

What a lovely afternoon!

Yeah I had the windows open all day and heard nothing, but I did hear the police chase the night before in the same area.🤷🏼‍♀️

I would put them all in my front yard😍😍😍

Sorry to hear that. I'll be up all night if you want to talk.💝

Beautiful!

A Dem lawmaker and her husband were killed by a guy for their political views and it’s already out of the news.

"wow" go see it ASAP or "wow" what a stinker?

Sympathy Fra Diavolo is such an overused noodle drop.

I did an event in DC & there was a party for donors etc after. Was talking to 2 ppl & I said "Things are so bad." They said "No this is how it is. Things swing one way, then another. It's normal."

That's when I realized why Dems are toothless. They have no idea what this is. Frogs boiling in water.

That's where I was going to order from. Ended up spending ~$350 for two pairs at Costco. (and you don't need to be a member to go there)

I was going to order glasses online but ended up going to Costco instead. Still very affordable, plus I could try them on in person.🤷🏼‍♀️ Very happy with what I got.

Maybe you're just like your mother (she's never satisfied)

So much for #BlueLivesMatter
👮‍♂️👮‍♀️

“And so the Greeks send me this horse, we’re talking about one of the most beautiful horses you’ve ever seen. So big. So strong. Normally they keep this kind of horse for themselves but they were such big fans they said sir, please take our big wonderful horse we’ll even bring it to your house”

the new york sewer rats have finally elected a new rat pope

"Gee, I've been using an awful lot of commas. Guess I should substitute a couple with em dashes." -me every time

Surprise! I'm actually 6 prescriptions and a bag of tortilla chips in a trench coat!

I was going to suggest "dogs in movies" trivia.

We like our Bosch a lot if it helps. Efficient layout, cleans great, practically silent.

They're sociopaths who get off on bullying, plain &simple

A perfect example of "be gay, do crime' ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Will scientists please study why staring at this glowing rectangle isn't making me happy & fulfilled?