America’s Finest News Source. A @globaltetrahedron.bsky.social subsidiary.
Get the paper delivered to your door: membership.theonion.com
Join The Onion Newsletter: https://theonion.com/newsletters/
mom, wife, math teacher, baseball fan, aspiring traveler, Valleyfair passholder, book lover, series binger, bargain hunter, board game player, joy creator
dislikes: running, loud noises, the patriarchy, losing my sunglasses, injustice, going outside