Hammy Ding Dong

3am borgar

Mournfully staring out the window, dreaming of more rain (but like, more than usual)

There are the tiniest buds of chanterelle mushrooms in my yard and I'm frothing at the mouth to pick them but they don't seem to be getting any bigger as I've been watching them over the last few days aaaaaa

Maybe it's just because I've been looking at it a lot lately as I've been mercilessly removing it from my yard (a hatchet was involved), but poison ivy is a really beautiful plant and I wish it didn't give me a rash so I could keep it around

Even though there's a whole ass show with a decent soundtrack, I can't help but immediately hear Blind Guardian's "Wheel of Time" in my head any time something triggers an association with it

*deep breath* I will not be baited into arguing with strangers about American/processed cheese just because they're insisting it's not cheese (it is cheese with some salts added to make it melty. Show me on the doll how that no longer constitutes being a cheese product)

Get it bc it's called "Poseidon's Kiss" when you get back splashed with toilet water

wakka wakka

The sacrificial piece of paper you put in the toilet before you poop so that it doesn't splash back up your butthole is called "Poseidon's Dental Dam"

I'm only familiar with Gillian Jacobs's works as Britta Perry and Atom Eve but uhhhh they're basically the same person huh

My head's already full of pollen but here I go opening my office window again. It's just too nice out to resist

Here are some more botanical friends from Constitution Lakes/near Doll's Head Trail. Garlic mustard and red deadnettle were EVERYWHERE, including growing out of fallen logs and dead trees!

Hopped off the boardwalk and trod tentatively through squishy mud about 50 feet off the trail to get a pic of this guy after spotting him from a distance. He's a summer or spring snowflake (both are naturalized to the southeast US)

I know the gal who tagged "Big Milk"! She's a riot

I know revolution is necessary at this point but I also feel like we've largely forgotten the power of booing and throwing rotten vegetables at public political addresses

Being a paralegal has given me more sorts of random, incohesive skills than even my tenure as the everywhere everything guy at the envelope factory

Recently learned how to convert all the weird, proprietary software A/V file types that my office deals with into more usable formats with VLC media player and I feel unstoppable. UNLIMITED POWERRRRR

Sometimes I wish I could self-google. For example, I cannot remember for the life of me how I first learned of the reputation of Buckfast as a Rowdy Boy Drink, but I definitely knew that before I looked it up recently to supplement (and verify 🤓) my explanation it to some friends

Unfortunately, loving Aldi SO much is rapidly becoming a major part of my personality. But like, have you gone to one?

gpoy (we still going gpoy? I'm still doing gpoy.)

Oh, no, haha. I was just really enjoying the rice, canned sardines, and Brussels sprouts I made. It feels like a struggle meal but I really like eating it

When ordered by Nazis to give lists of disabled people by disability severity, some doctors sent back exaggerated data to protect patients from forced work

They didn't know that the "most disabled" were to be killed first

The moral here isn't to tell the truth

It's to never co-operate with Nazis

I'm sure it'd eventually get tiresome, but I'm pretty sure I could exist happily on fish, rice, and greens

hello cis friends
this is what people mean by trans genocide

if a type of person does not officially exist, then any harm against them cannot be measured or reported

this headline change isn't even being caused by an executive order

it's simply the NYT editors deciding we don't deserve to exist

I didn't used to like it, but the kind I remember not liking was rly heavy on mayonnaise. The kind I've been buying is very cheeseful

I'm having what feels like a very minimalist hobbit lunch:

Toasted bread, pimento cheese w jalapenos, tomato and chili jam, with spicy cornichon on the side (chopsticks are the perfect pickle-handling utensil)

Plus Bobby Hill (Pamela Adlon) and Leland Palmer (Ray Wise) are in it, and Deanna, in disguise, basically pimps Riker out as her personal big strong boi to the Mintankan villagers. It's super cute AND contemplative

"Who Watches the Watchers" might be my favorite episode of TNG. It's a sleeper hit to me--which often end up being my favorites--but it asks really big questions and the grace with which Picard handles being treated like a god makes me teary eyed

"They're the kinda eyes you could fall in. And summer in. And winter in, too."

Charlie is fucking slick wtf

I know I'm several years late to the party but like... Mac's coming out dance on Always Sunny was kind of amazing???

Finally wore these out somewhere 😎