Uboa

I still felt awful in the crashes. it was like my brain telling me I *needed* very high estrogen, far higher than most.

"your dosage would have been 4mg per week, then at 0.08 the dosage would have been closer to 3mg per week" according my friend/housemate who helped me out. I had absurdly high levels so we lowered the dose. again, 40 pmol concentration and it was estradiol ethanate

Post by @uboatheflesh 💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 1 · Regarding my genius page. ·  For a while I maintained that I did not want people making their own interpretations of the lyrics on the Origin of my Depression. At the time, i was…

btw before I attempt to sleep: you can annotate the origin of my depression now. I go into detail why here.

I do but rarely use it and not too sure if it works. I use whatsapp?

oh, I can't receive DM's as due to australian underage social media ban and I don't trust my documents with the company. I have an email: uboatheflesh (at) gmail (dot) com

thanks so much for you help, gonna be honest this is the first time I've heard somebody say there's hope.

we need more warnings about it. it's the default in australia - usually progynova pills, patches or implants + quarter tablet of cypro every 2 days. I've known several people nearly take their lives from the PMDD depression because they get gaslit it isn't PMDD as we are "biologically male" 😡

They actually didn't. The would carefully warn of the risks but not stop me - and suggested my health issues had nothing to do with hormones. They may not be caused in the last instance by them... but I suspect they are modulated by them.

found the vial (sorry its 4am here) estradiol enanthate 40mg/ml, and yeah weekly, sometimes 8 days if ADHD or illness kicks in. I cannot remember how much I'd inject as it was a year ago - subcutaneous (around the belly fat). Would have to ask my housemate how much i took, but less than most.

Thyriod was checked a few months ago - normal (164 nmol). Cortisol a lowish, but not in hypothyriod ranges. SHBG was very high (136). Low Iron (23-55) had an infusion, no difference just yet but still waiting). Low vitamin D now fixed. I got everything checked that you could in australia.

main cause of low BP is eating food. main cause of high BP is... not eating food or taking the ketotfen. I swear when i was above WPATH levels of E it didn't happen, but I was repeatedly told to lower my levels and im kinda angry, confused and a little scared im going to have a stroke from neglect

I honestly need to be put in a lab to isolate the variables. I left my old GP for a new one as the entire chaos kinda burnt us both out from each other.

What's worrying and dangerous is my BP occasionally zooms between "fainting low" (below 110/80) to "stroke high" (160/110)

However, POTS also worsened after a virus. Currently on ketotfen for controlling me being "IBS allergic to all food" which causes the dysautonomia. It's impossible to isolate causality.

One thing I do know is I have PMDD - cypro made me depressed. 200mg prog fixed it - usually oral.

Previous I had an implant and had only slightly lower levels than injection until it depleted - then I started feeling chronically ill as if it was menopausal. TBH, the POTS/MCAS thing feels like menopause, but my E levels were still about 1000 when feeling ick. POTS worsened after the implant.

40p/mol concentration, roughly once a week. chronic illness and slight hypochondria about fucking up the needle made it hard to keep up. Levels would shoot up like crazy. Would crash the night before my next injection, despite high troughs, and would feel more POTSy.

well, hot dog! guess who is number 1 ?

yeah, nobody has been much help for ten years sadly. neither the healthcare system nor the doll network really know why my E levels go so hard, no research on women-dominated chronic illnesses that are modulated by hormones etc. getting to the point of considering posting on the will powers reddit

and you're ok? sounds pretty similar to me. 5300 doesn't sound safe, but maybe every body has different goldilocks zones. I certainly felt better on a higher dose. The issue is my BP oscillates from as low as 100 sys to 160 due to histamine making me oscillate between POTS and hypertension.

still awaiting to see my levels from the gel. If worse comes to worse I'll just have to DIY under GP supervision and hope she is down with harm reduction as we have NO legal method of doing injectables in aus, especially rural aus. implants had the same issue anyway.

2k was my Trough levels. Peak was likely higher. Certainly felt estrogen-dominant without prog, can't sleep without prog at all.

oddly enough, i still got my vial from a year ago and can inject ok even if I hate it. I felt better but I had even other trans women go "maybe its too high"

lol dyslexia moment: getting bottom surgery. u know what I mean. im a white girl i don't have much butt anyway. got a taylor swift situation down there.

if anybody was wondering, yes, I had low t and high e prior to hrt - delayed puberty + gynomastia. not XXY or any known intersex condition - but given how I seem to hyper-absorb and keep E in my blood - I probably have some intersex-adjecent undiagnosable thing going on thats messing with me.

Any other mtf zebras know what to do with HRT? Currently my only long term plan to control my T is getting a bottom, but that could be 3 years away. I hate my weird genes. Sure better than being insensitive to E, but I don't want a stroke - especially with how variable by BP and HR can be.

Given I either am A) hyper-absorbent or B) slow metaboliser of excess E (likely from low COMT) and given every (cis!) medical professional got scared at my E test results... but I felt better... should I be wary of DIY monotherapy? The aus cis healthcare system has no answers for me.

biggest issue is my EDS, POTS which is secondary to MCAS. I worry high E + high histamine just will put me in a perpetual state of fight or flight and low blood pressure. Luckily not too bendy on progesterone, but lost a bit of strength. High E without prog makes me anxious as hell without MCAS.

Currently on e-gel (my IBS makes pills a crapshoot) and bica and feel like im not getting enough E/too much T based on libido, my appearance masculinising a bit and chronic health weirdness. on prog 200mg, but shelving didnt do much other than be gross to do nightly.

HRT question: I see my dr on thursday and I still don't know what to do with my HRT after about 10 years.

I tried DIY (only option in aus) monotherapy and had levels of 2000 or so because my body didn't process E quick and my harm-reduction endo begged me to stop. however...

don't worry kitten death industrial

CAN YOU AMERICANS ORGANISE ALREADY? LIKE WHAT ARE Y'ALL DOING. YOU HAVE A PEDOPHILE NAZI PRESIDENT WHO IS TRYING TO START WORLD WAR THREE. y'all proving the third-world maoists right. keep posting i guess. I am sick of losing sleep because your dumb genocidal state is trying to end the world.

once again reminding everyone to funnel your emotions into organizing and building solidarity in your community and not pointless doomscrolling