Rants McKMS

Why are people like "omg we should totally hang out!!!" And then never speak to you again?
I don't understand human interaction in the slightest. Social norms are absolutely ridiculous and make no sense

when everyone tells you to get help, but when you try and are aware of everything, people assume you are lying because people that are in therapy are supposed to be stupid and crazy and unaware of their own issues. Things don't magically change once you become aware of your illness.

Feels like there is this inherent distrust towards patients that are self aware from doctors. Always this assumption of malingering or drug seeking instead of a person who is just aware of their problems and wants help. What are you supposed to do

If it makes me vapid and narcissistic that I feel bad about not having any friends/people left that care, that nobody that acknowledges or contacts me, that I go through life having to pretend like I'm okay with all this because complaining makes everyone hate me more, then idk

How does everyone else just inherently have a concept of what's the right amount of x thing in any given setting? I only learn by being yelled at/rejected socially/bullied, etc, and even then I'm not sure if its right

So I'm supposed to be social but not care about what people think and seek connection but not seek validation and like people but don't get attached to them, be myself, be authentic and do everything for me but not be upset when nobody ever acknowledges me.
What a lukewarm and confusing existence.

What even is the point of doing anything anymore

Chill, "unproblematic" people that have no convictions and are too cool and relaxed to have opinions are some of my least favorite people

So this whole time, it was you

Man fuck pissrael

What's the point of having someone ask me how I'm doing if they don't like the answer?
I will avoid the question and just focus on them but they are PERSISTENT about asking, and when I tell them that I'm "struggling but managing" or whatever they just fucking ghost me. What do people want??

Hardwired for bad decisions

I feel like this bitch fr

No coping mechanism is valid enough, it's never "healthy" enough. I'm always supposed to do everything the "right" way but end up doing the opposite every time no matter how hard I try. I'm always doing everything wrong, always

Whoops sorry for my alcoholism, it's just that it's the only thing that can calm this black cloud inside that is suffocating me constantly. Sorry I'm not a good functioning member of society, sorry I keep failing everyone's expectations. Always a failure in everyone's eyes

What are you supposed to do, how are you supposed to behave and act chill and civil 100% of the time when everyone around you treats you like the plague

Maybe I wouldn't have gotten to this point of pure negativity and resentment if everyone hadn't abandoned me, I know I'm not fun to be around but I don't think I was always like this. I used to have hope and light in my life

Acting like he was some kind of shining divine beacon of free speech (he wasn't), and then right after, forcing dire consequences onto people that express their right to free speech about the situation.

The irony and hypocrisy is explosive, but they don't live in a world where things make sense.

I don't want to hear shit from the right about political violence when they are the reigning purveyors of it throughout history.

Acting like we need to be respectful and tolerant of everyone's beliefs even when the beliefs involve direct violence and oppression towards those vulnerable groups that can't even advocate for themselves is a great example of this false equivalence bullshit that is being forced onto us.

If your "political beliefs" are the denial of the rights or existence of the most vulnerable and disenfranchised people in society, I don't want to hear shit about "civility", "politeness" and "disagreements". You should be treated like the radical, evil fuck that you are.

The thing that drives me the craziest about all this is the revising and rewriting history to fit this ridiculous narrative that is all based on malicious lies. It's all free speech until you actually speak the truth and then all of a sudden you lose your job, your driver's license, your passport.

We are living in clown world I swear to god.
And not even the cool kind of clown world.

I'm so sick of being alone sometimes.

What is it that I need to do, and who is it that I need to be
Why am I still here

Expectations of civility in these times of unchecked oppression and suffering is worse than a bullet to the neck.

It's always blame pushed on us for things we can't control about our own brains, no matter how much we try, but nobody would tell a person in a wheelchair to just simply walk and stop being weak.
We have a long way to go and lots of people need to examine the fascist beliefs towards the mentally ill

There is always understanding and kindness extended towards those in a wheelchair, those who are physically disabled, but the difference is that they(may) have able minds. Not all disabled people have physical disabilities, but we treat those with mental ones like garbage that should be locked away.