Chris Brookmyre

The current argument of the British right is that Muslims turned out in "blocs" with "family voting" to cast their ballots for a party led by a gay Jewish man, and this shows that multiculturalism has failed, voting is "sectarian" and we are in a crisis.

Hmmmmmm.

Grifters have worked out that "I'm just a fearless truth-teller willing to propose the necessary but politically incorrect solution," is a magic formula whereby if you're offensive enough the conversation focuses on whether you should have said it, and misses how your ideas are dumb as hell.

Come and hear me and @brookmyre.bsky.social talk about Tombstoning TONIGHT at @portybooks.bsky.social. There will be banter and music and all sorts.
www.theportobellobookshop.com/events/doug-...
@orendabooks.bsky.social

I appreciate all of these detailed analysis of what’s wrong with the policy, but the crucial thing to keep in mind here is that Donald Trump sincerely, literally does not understand what a tariff is and when that is your starting point, nothing beyond it really matters.

Fancy a maritime-set culture-wars satire featuring Jack Parlabane all at sea? Get 25% off this week.

www.waterstones.com/campaign/feb...

“What do you want to do on your birthday Andrew?”
“I dunno - surprise me.”

Oh, the grand old duke of york
He ██████████████████
He ██████████████████
And he ██████████████████

Fancy a maritime-set culture-wars satire featuring Jack Parlabane all at sea? Get 25% off this week.

www.waterstones.com/campaign/feb...

There's 25% off pre-orders for Quite Ugly One Evening from today until February 20.
www.waterstones.com/campaign/feb...

There's 25% off pre-orders for Quite Ugly One Evening from today until February 20.
www.waterstones.com/campaign/feb...

You may laugh, but the Macbeths are a much better role model for a marriage than Romeo and Juliet. They discuss their problems (killing the king of Scotland), share their hobbies (killing the king of Scotland), and resolve their conflicts (by killing the king of Scotland).

This is actually quite brilliant, up to and including the final sentence 🔥

Absolutely in love 😍 with these Korean copies of The Space Between Us, published by Moonhak Soochup. So beautiful.
@orendabooks.bsky.social
@agentphil.bsky.social

Tangent: my Japanese tutor finds animal noises in English frustrating. Japanese has one verb for an animal making a noise. We have one per animal and often two, one of them onomatopoeia. Roosters broke her when I said the word for cock-a-doodle-doo is "to crow" despite that being a whole other bird.

Pour one out for every professional political pundit, writer, consultant whatever that has spent the last decade trying to pretend that the Trump phenomenon was about trade or opiates and not a big chunk of white america losing its mind over having a black president bsky.app/profile/kyle...

Heading to Greenock for the Beacon Arts Festival on Sunday February 22nd. I'll be chatting about The Cracked Mirror and looking ahead to Quite Ugly One Evening.
www.beaconartscentre.co.uk/spektrix-roo...

Jack Brookmyre on Instagram: "Gollum's podcast If you enjoy impressions like this, please check out my shows! (Ticket links in bio) #comedy #sketchcomedy #scottishcomedy #impression #lotr #gollum #l... 16 likes, 0 comments - jackbrookmyre on February 3, 2026: "Gollum's podcast If you enjoy impressions like this, please check out my shows! (Ticket links in bio) #comedy #sketchcomedy #scottishcomedy...

www.instagram.com/reel/DUTTCgV...
Gollum & Smeagol have started their own politics podcast.

My debut novel, TOMBSTONING, is getting a 20th anniversary reissue with a beautiful new cover and intro by @brookmyre.bsky.social. We'll be chatting at @portybooks.bsky.social on Wed 25th Feb, it will be raucous, I bet.
www.theportobellobookshop.com/events/doug-...
@orendabooks.bsky.social

Theakston Old Peculier Crime Writing Festival | Harrogate International Festivals Book tickets for shows at Theakston Old Peculier Crime Writing Festival online today!

I am honoured and deeply chuffed to be a Special Guest at the 2026 Theakston Old Peculier Crime Writing Festival! Join me at the unmissable gathering of crime fans next July. For more info and to book your tickets visit harrogateinternationalfestivals.com/crime-writin... #TheakstonsCrime

There will be multiple chances. I will be doing lots of events this summer. Watch this space.

The end of January is finally in sight. Downside is only four more days to get The Cracked Mirror for 99p on Kindle.

Roll on the summertime!

Labour are wrong to say Farage is just "stuffing his party with failed Tories". Many of them are disgraced Tories.

A reminder to the news media: “conflicting accounts” is what you say BEFORE the incontrovertible video evidence appears. After that, your job is to ask why one side is lying, not to repeat the lie and pretend no one knows the truth.

The Cracked Mirror is still a mere 99p for the month of January, meaning this deal only has another seventy-eight days to run.
www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CKYRHQ4B/

Starmer maybe rightly doesn’t take bait each time but he needs an outrider - a semi-licensed “off message” attack dog - to make Haw-Haw Farage pay for sucking up to the guy who denigrates British war dead.

"Meanwhile, Princess Anne went for a ride in Kirkbride, Queen Camilla went shopping in Wapping, Prince Edward dropped a clanger in Bangor, and the young ladies of Buckingham asked Prince Andrew if he'd mind staying at home.

Now it's goodnight from me ...
... and it's goodnight from him."

To be serious, I wouldn’t mind so much about celebrities getting children’s book deals if it worked both ways, and more authors got mainstream TV coverage.